DIARY OF A WORKING MARRIED MOTHER: A mother’s worries

Most mothers start to have deep and gripping fears for and about their children once they have been conceived. I am not any different. From the day I found out I was pregnant with our first child, I was excited but also worried. I had not been sleeping under a mosquito net some days and my cousin scared the living daylights out of me about that. The fears grew from me worrying about whether they would be born with a debilitating disease to not surviving past their first year of life.

Now the two girls are grown and in good health, but the worries never stop. I worry that the older one is a little too sensitive (kinda like her mum). I wonder whether she will be able to meet obstacles and go through without being scarred for life. I worry that sometimes I am do not understand her as well as I should or that I do not give her enough time. On the other hand, I wonder if her sister will be a little too insensitive. She is still young but can decide to blank you out if you annoy her and move away from you for a good amount of time.

I think about their future. Will they do well in school? I know that there is more to life than academics and I am ready to help them pursue their interests and talents. But the way we have been brought up, we are made to believe education is a most important thing so I keep wondering if they will do well. I do not necessarily want geniuses. But I would worry if they were always among the bottom 10.

I want to believe that if they found themselves in any awkward position, their father and I would give them all the support and love. Still, my prayer is that they do not get pregnant out of wedlock, that they do not make decisions that scar them really badly.

Like a friend told me, the minute you conceive, you sign up to be a mother and the worries come with the job.

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