Full Woman

Diary of a working married mother:What I hope to carry into the New Year

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Posted  Saturday, December 28   2013 at  02:00

I have learnt a few things I hope to carry into the New Year, that hard work pays and if you want to rise wherever you are, you have to be humble enough to realise your follies (and work on them) as well as do over and above what is expected of you. This I have learnt from two people who unfortunately do the very opposite.

The maid I have currently is okay. The children love her, she is usually on time and every once in a while, she will do something innovative. Knowing what other people face with their maids, I cannot complain much about mine. That said, there are some flaws that just grate on my nerves. For one, she sulks when being reprimanded, never mind that I do it in the most humble or even friendly way. She goes terribly quiet and withdraws into her bedroom. And then she can be forgetful. We need to keep reminding her of certain things to do, which can be annoying. She also sometimes does not tell the full story of something gone wrong and we end up finding out days later. As such, I keep comparing her and a former maid who was just the sweetest. Former maid was hard working, listened when being reprimanded and never repeated a mistake. She was lovely. She left because of a precarious situation in her family. Looking back, I think if she had shared this situation with me early enough, I would have been willing to do whatever it took to help her. I felt she deserved it and more.

The irony is now, current maid has a similar sort of situation. When I think about her circumstances, I try to figure out how we can do a little more to help, but when I get home, I find out she has forgotten to do that thing that Mr has asked her to do, several times before. I ask her about it, she mumbles a forced apology, does the rest of the work haphazardly and then sulks for the next two days. It just deflates me of the goodwill I had for her. I am therefore not as keen on a salary raise for her or doing her that huge favour she wanted, as I would have done for the former maid.

It is a similar situation at work. Junior worker does have her pluses; she is always at work on time and is a team player. But when it comes to the much needed skills, she is lacking and all the advice given seems not to be working. It does not help that she seems to think it is everyone else’s problem and not hers. As such, all the opportunities I am given to hand over to my people for travel, trainings and workshops have passed her by and gone to fellow workmates because I am not sure she is deserving of them right now.

I have seen how these traits have kept these otherwise good women from getting ahead in life fast enough and have promised myself to constantly ensure I am one of the people thought of first when an opportunity arises because of my hard work.