I pity the old women marrying mere boys

Talk of love and urbanites will ask, “What’s age got to do with it?” In fact, women will be quick to remind you of how age is nothing but a mere digit on the number line. It is a way of reminding whoever may be concerned that when it comes to affairs of the heart, age has no part to play.

Modern pop-culture refers to women who date younger men as cougars, a term they were once embarrassed of. As society has continued to approve of such relationships, however, the women have embraced the cougar title.

Jane will openly share with her girls over a glass of wine how much she prefers her “prey” younger. Then her girls will break into a fit of giggles, urging her to “Go girl!”

Going overboard
There is nothing wrong with a 32-year-old woman dating a man who is 29. A three year age gap does not hurt. In fact, let us make it five.

We will not cringe in our seats when you stand on the podium and tell us you are five years older than your husband or thereabout. Okay, maybe a little.

Some of us will momentarily judge, we always do.
But we will soon get over it and get back to the impossible job of minding our own business, espcially if neither of you looks their real age in the couple.

It is, in otherwords, okay for an older woman to date a younger man. We only lose tolerance for it when ‘older’ is just really old! When the woman is not just three years older but three times older than the man, or boy for that matter.

And these cases are awash. Forty-year-old women have been reported to park their cars at university hostels to poach on the young boys there still wearing red jeans.

Many times, the parties in these relationships know it is all just a fling and nothing can come of it apart from the sexual pleasure.

Sadly though, the old women have often lost themselves in the process and apparently fallen in love.

They have found themselves contemplating a future with these boys, and hoping for rings. In high-end situations, these old women have actually gone ahead to marry boys fit to be their sons, and of late, grandsons.

Every time I have heard stories of women dating or marrying men 20 years their junior, I have not been the quickest to judge. But I have always felt sorry for the woman in question.

Love and delusions
First, I ponder on what it is that makes a 50-year-old woman choose or settle for a man of 25? It could be loneliness, the kind that makes her hop onto the next guy willing to offer company.

Sometimes however I imagine it is love, the love she has for this boy. What she never understands is that this love is hardly reciprocated. The young men in such relationships rarely, if ever share the same feelings.

Let us face it; why would a young man of 25 still in shape, popular among the girls his age, and full of life, want to date or marry a woman thrice his age? Could it be that he is so madly in love with her? Hardly so.

The truth you don’t see
The bitter truth is that most of these boys come for the money. Such is the power of money that some men will not hesitate to put up a show of love for an old woman they do not fancy, to access her heavy bank account, the gateway to life’s pleasure.

If it is not money, then maybe it is love. Either way, the end is always going to be the same. The young lad will wake one day and realise what he initially felt was never love.

He will notice the lack of compatibility as the age difference puts the interests of both parties so widely apart.

He may soon get embarrassed of the decision he made because peers are always going to throw it in his face.

He may even feel he is missing out on the fun, because surely, every man in his 20s finds 60-year-old women boring. It is at this point that he will channel part of his sugar mummy’s money into dating girls his age.

And who will blame him? No one. “It was a longtime coming,” they will say.
I cannot imagine the pain of nursing a heartbreak at 60, which is where I can bet these relations will end up. Maybe old women should just let the young boys be.