Saturday February 1 2014

Male ramblings :I want to be left alone


By Eugene Mugisha

I have this extremely attractive boss. Yes, she, which is why I said she is extremely attractive. In another lifetime, another planet, another dimension, our places might have been reversed, and I might have been her boss.

Then, my situation would probably be “understandable”, after all isn’t it common place for male bosses to hunt among their subordinates? In the real world though, my boss has a thing for me, simply put, and she has not bothered to keep this to herself. Everyone at my workplace now knows, and I’m one miserable guy. I know. You are thinking that I should be thrilled having a hot boss on my heels, right? Well, no, I’m not at all thrilled. I’m, in fact, disturbed by the entire situation. And do not get me wrong ladies, it is every man’s fantasy to have a hot woman publicly focus her affections on him. It gives guys an ego boost, even if that is all that comes out of it. But the fact that she is my boss takes the magic out of it for me.

I have tried on several occasions to rationalise it, even tried to make myself get thrilled, but it is just not working for me. When my workmates are busy imagining and envying me for having the time of my life, I’m wishing I had a choice, like the option to quit my job. But, that is out of the question for the mean time. The female co-worker I sought counsel from seemed so puzzled by my disturbance wondering what the problem is; I am, after all, a single guy with a hot boss on my tail!

Hmmm, and that is just it; no one seems to get my dilemma, not even the boss herself. Once, we met in the lift. I tried to evade her by letting the lift go, but she held the doors for me, and smiled like a wolf eyeing a rabbit. I swear I shouldn’t have gone in there, but like I said, I cannot afford to lose my job right now. So, I got in there, my only hope being that other people would soon hop on. But no one did as we ascended all of 31 floors! How rotten is my luck?

She attacked me. First, she grabbed my hand. Then she asked why I was ignoring her; didn’t I find her attractive enough? Was I into men instead? Did I want a salary raise?
Yes, I found her extremely attractive. No, I’m not into men and, no, I did not want a salary raise I did not earn on credit, credit being my work performance, the reason I was hired. I just want to be left alone to do my work.

I know where I hunt, and it is not at my work place, and certainly not among my bosses. In other circles, I’m a raging lion believe me. But this situation has managed to un-man me, and I do not like this at all. A woman should have the sense to know that just because I am a man, I am not like a gun, cocked and ready to fire, with no sense of direction when it comes to women. I’m into hot women, even older women once in a while, but throw in other factors, like being my boss, and I don’t want it any more.