My girl bought herself a ring

I used to think people who said they practise self-love were crazy, like the whole situation of being single just got to their heads.

Recently, I spoke with one of my girls and I was amazed by the fact that she was spotting an expensive gold ring – on her wedding finger. Thinking I was really behind the times, I asked her if she had decided to legalise her union at the marriage registry. Then, I was puzzled at who had put the ring on her finger because as far as I knew, she was not seeing anyone.

She laughed at my confusion and then, decided to let me in on the secret of self-love. Apparently, she had actually saved for three months to buy the ring from some Asian shop in town. When she brought the package home, she walked into her bedroom and lit some candles to create a romantic atmosphere. Then, standing in front of the mirror, she ‘got married to herself.”

Honestly, what kind of joke is this? I was tempted to think my friend needs psychological help but she was talking normally, so how could she be insane? Since that ceremony, she has never removed the ring. She says it is best to start by loving yourself before Mr Right comes and loves you.

On Valentine’s Day, she went to a florist on Kampala Road and ordered two bouquets of red roses. The cards on the bouquets were all addressed to her. She sent one to her workplace and another to her gated apartment.

So, while everyone was swooning over the beautiful prose and the roses that a mystery gentleman had sent her, deep down in her heart she knew she was short-changing them. Maybe a single woman with so much liquid money at her disposal is not such a good idea, after all.

Why go to such great lengths to prove to yourself that you love yourself? Why not just buy yourself a dress, pair of jeans, laptop, or even take yourself out to dinner. But buying yourself a ring? My pastor would have a fit!
His favourite sermon is about how we bind ourselves to unknown entities through rings. By standing in the mirror, in a candlelit ceremony, my friend was surely inviting some passing spiritual entities minding their own business.