We, men have always been accused of having high appetite for sex. I will use the word “romance” for the rest of the article.
The proponents of that line of argument assume and emphatically assert that to men, nothing else other than romance matters. Maybe they are right; men want romance but just a moment, to say that romance is all we want or need in a woman is telling half the story.
Many factors determine our choice of likes and dislikes. To put this in perspective, one needs to understand what drives men’s choices. These are many but I will tell you one, men want to be men, period.
I may need romance (and I think I do) but I want a wife who can cook. Don’t you know what we all know that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach? For a woman to get to my heart therefore, and every woman would want to get to her husband’s heart, she should go through my stomach. I want a wife who, when I come back home, will welcome me with a glass of juice while assuring me that food is the next thing I will be served. I want to feel comfortable leaving the poorly prepared food at work knowing that my wife has cooked the best dish.
I cannot imagine marrying a woman who suggests that we eat out all the time. I would wonder what, in getting married, she thought she came to do. When it comes to a woman getting married, the Baganda put it very rightly. They say “ageenze kufumba (she’s gone to cook). Do you think those wise men and women did not know how to say that she is gone to romance her husband? Of course they did, and bedroom matters are revered in our culture that’s why the sengas are such an asset but our ancestors knew that before the couple gets into bed they first sit at the dining table.
This is not to say I will subject my wife to hard labour in the name of cooking, no. Eating good food prepared by my wife is my basic need I will request her fulfill just as I fulfill her basic need of loving only her and no other woman. Cooking, for me, shows how this woman cares about me and wants me to be healthy and in the best shape to perform my marital duties and pursue our dreams.
I have heard careful and wise women say while in the kitchen things like, “no, my husband won’t like this. I will try to spice this up for him.” When you look in the face of those women, you see a woman who is not into a marriage for the sake of their children but because she loves her husband.
Woman, listen to me; this is the edge; a woman who knows how to cook has over others who may want to prey over her man.