Saturday June 21 2014

The strange case of woman

By Paul Adude

The Bible refers to them as “man’s rib”. So then I wonder, how can man fail to understand the actions of his own body? Take the following behaviours that have made it hard for men to interpret women:
You have this female friend you have not spoken to for over a week and when you eventually call, she throws this tirade of angry sentences into your ear of how irresponsible, inconsiderate and uncaring you are.

Puzzled by all these accusations, you ask her what you did wrong, and she bluntly states, “I have been sick the whole week and you didn’t even bother to check on me.” At that moment, the only thought that comes to mind is whether she sees you as a prophet who is supposed to be aware of whatever happens in her life without any one telling you. Then, the silent treatment, accompanied with the cold stare.

Strangest part about it is that 99 per cent of the time we are clueless of our crime. This is a great shocker to us guys, which divides our minds into two, whether to apologise or just feed you back with your own pill.

And in comes the competition to keep up with the “girl next door”, not the movie but even a friend, trying to dress better than them, have a better lifestyle and trying to outdo them in almost all fields, we dated you for who you are not who you want to be better than. Another trait we fail to get is the close relationship that females hold with lies, they rarely tell the truth and would rather prefer you keep on telling them little white lies than making them face the truth.

Then, comes the bathroom fights. From not placing the toilet seat back after use, to the more ridiculous ones like squeezing toothpaste in the middle and not the bottom! We just do not get how such a minor issue is supposed to tick you off.

What difference does it make when I squeezed it at the top? And that is not all. There comes this whole concept that women hold when getting into relationships, “I will change him”. Why is there thought that we got you because we needed you to change our lives from the way we lived them before you came into the picture?

Another weird one is the despising of every other women that passes by, throwing a comment about their attire, style of walking, name it. We would really prefer it if you at times let some things pass.

The idea of letting your girlfriends manage your love life is another thing we fail to wrap our minds around, from who you are supposed to date, where to go for a date, how your man is supposed to treat you... do we really have to put up with all your girlfriends?

So, all my lovely women, your husband, spouse, boyfriend or whichever term you call your man, one thing is for certain, they are not blessed with prophetic visions to know what goes on in your head. Make the whole thing simpler, open up more.