Time to have the hard talk
Min Atek
Mummy,’ the dear child asked? ‘Where do babies come out from?’
I must have blinked several times as I took in the question. My mind ran a zillion miles. This caught me offguard, a question that I knew needed me to respond appropriately and thus the need for a moment to quickly compose myself. I told him to give me a moment to finish some things before I could give him all my attention. That was simply an excuse. I needed the moment to find the right answer; perhaps one that was honest and yet not too graphic for a little mind.
Recently, someone politely asked to show me a video clip. I was warned that it was quite graphic but the sender felt that as a parent, I needed to watch it.
Now there are certain evils which seem to surmount other evils. Otherwise how else do you explain a man who gets someone’s four or five year old and teaches/subjects the child to their sexual fantasies? The man doing this was a close family friend who often offered to help keep the little girl whenever the mother was busy. How evil can one be?
My mind run to the uncomfortable questions a parent has to deal with. For some, sitting their children down to candidly speak with them about life and sexuality is a taboo. Somehow there is a wish that perhaps the child will somehow get to know what they must know. Some wish they could ferry the children to an aunt, a grandmother or a friend to help. And yet the realities are upon us.
Recently, one child was telling me about a homosexual. I asked them to define it and the answer was, ‘a person who sleeps with many people!’
The mind of an 11-year-old had understood it a certain way. I used the opportunity to address the subject candidly. Initially, even the child was embarrassed but such is life.
Once again, I ponder the seemingly uninteresting realities of life and how best to handle them. With the onset of internet and social media, with so much information freely accessed even by toddlers, the questions arise. Is the parent rising to the occasion too?
After composing myself, I called my child so we could discuss the subject of where babies come out from. I asked him what he thought and after giggling, he told me how his classmate had given an answer which was too much for him which is why he wanted to confirm from me.
Basing on what he already knew, we spoke and I dwelt on the two methods with a huge emphasis on the caesarian section. He listened with interest asked some questions and soon the subject changed because he was satisfied by the discussion.
