Life

5 reasons why traffic jam should be a politician

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By Peter Kakoma

Posted  Sunday, June 29  2014 at  01:00
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Traffic jam has been with us for a few decades now. We meet him on our way to work, on our way from work and have a few discussions during the course of the day-some in the middle of town and others on the outskirts.
You can always count on running into him every day. He’s one of us. A few have proposed that he gets a seat in parliament. Here are their reasons:

Traffic jam is consistent
Regardless of where you live (special shout-out to Ntinda, Zana, Kireka and Bunga), you’ll testify to the fact that traffic jam can be counted on every single day.

We need politicians who are consistent. No day goes by without traffic jam showing-up, ready to take on a new day’s challenge

He is early
In a nation that struggles to keep time, a nation where meetings, seminars and all forms of gatherings begin hours after the prearranged time, traffic jam is a breath of fresh air. It gives hope to all those who feel that consistent time-keeping stands no chance here. Traffic is on the road as early as 6.30am, even earlier in some parts. In the evening, he’s there by 5.15pm-bright, chirpy and always seeming like he had a great day.

And he knows us
We need someone in parliament who knows us-someone who won’t table bills that don’t speak for us. Someone who will actually consult ‘the people’ when he says he will.
Someone who won’t need facilitation to consult ‘the people’-he meets every day!
He knows which ones of us are impatient-how we cut through and create new lanes, he knows which ones of us feel entitled-how we budge into the road without asking, he knows which ones are indecisive-how we take forever deciding whether to join a road or not, he knows which ones are angry and out
to spread it-traffic knows us.

He is always awake
During the day, traffic is always awake in one part of the city or the other. This means he won’t sleep during the State-of-the Nation address. He’ll be alert when the budget is being read. His eyes will stay peeled throughout celebrations at Kololo airstrip. He won’t nod continuously during a parliamentary session.

Contributing to the economy
We owe very high fuel consumption to him. We owe traffic police’s livelihood, at the expense of using traffic lights, to him.