My aunt liked her before I did

When and where did you meet?
Racheal: We met at Minakulu Technical Institute in 1998. He was ahead of me by one year but we became friends as we often met in the institutional premises before classes. While in my second year, my sister who was paying for me passed on so I told him I was going to drop out of school as I could not afford my tuition. He offered to pay for me one term using his pocket money but about the same time, his aunt fell sick so he requested me to help take care of her. While at her home, his aunt grew fond of me. In fact, she paid for my tuition when she recovered. Then I enrolled at Kyambogo University for a diploma where she still paid for me.
Fred: I met Racheal at school. Unlike others, she was always kind to me. We used to play cards before classes and she would never ace me. When my aunt who was my guardian fell sick, she took care of her for about 10 months in hospital. We became so close that you could mistake us for siblings. When aunt recovered, she asked me what Racheal meant to me. I told her we were just friends. She went on to ask how I would feel if another man took away such a caring woman. This was like a hint to me that I had gold but had not realised it. I thought deeply about it for a while but at first was shy to tell her about my feelings for her.

Had you ever told her about your feelings?
Fred: One day, I asked her how she felt if we became husband and wife. She said no and asked me who then would be her brother. She asked for time to think about it but I was always around her so somehow the chemistry grew and without even realising it, we became lovers. We dated for two years and later got children. We now have three children and our first born is 13 years old.

Before wedding, had you gone for traditional marriage?
Racheal: Yes, in 2008, we had a traditional marriage ceremony but a church wedding remained dream.

What attracted you to each other?
Racheal: He is gentle, caring, loving and kind.
Fred: She is gentle and loving.

When did you propose?
Fred: Since we became close friends and then lovers, I never made a formal proposal. Everything just worked out naturally.

How much did you spend?
Fred: We spent about Shs32m. Décor was the most expensive item because much as it’s my company that decorated, my wife chose unique colours; red and gold which we did not have in stock. We had to buy chair and table covers. We also bought flowers from Kampala. We had 87 tables and each of these had a flower centerpiece; this cost Shs10m. Food cost Shs11m.

How did you raise the money?
Fred: We had some savings and raised the rest through our friends and family. We also held four wedding meetings.

How did you manage to fit all into the budget?
Fred: Most people contributed food items in kind so we mainly bought some matooke, beef and some chicken. My uncle contributed some matooke and other relatives brought chicken. We had a lot to eat.

What was your most exciting moment?
Racheal: It was when my entourage and I arrived at church and found very many people waiting to celebrate with us our special day.
Fred: My mother being able to come and rejoice with us on this great day. She had been sickly but always prayed to have strength to be with us on our wedding day. God enabling her to come and be with us made my day complete.

Did you face any disappointments?
Racheal: At the reception, power went off and the music system couldn’t work. However, I ignored this and enjoyed my day.
Fred: I was determined to enjoy my day so ignored anything negative and focused on just that. I enjoyed every part of our wedding and don’t remember anything disappointing me.

Did you have any premarital counselling?
Fred: Yes, at church. I learnt to always respect my partner and endeavour to make decisions together as a couple.
Racheal: I learnt that your partner is your first born and should always be given the first priority. Many times when we get married and have children we relegate our partners to the second place and hardly care about their needs.
In the counselling sessions however, we were taught that we should always come first in each other’s lives.

What advice do you have for young people planning to follow the same route?
Racheal: To have a wedding, you don’t have to have a lot of money. Put together what you have and plan within your means.
Fred: Wed someone you truly love because, marriages have their challenges that if not built on a strong foundation can collapse.
When you marry someone you love, love will prevail above all the other things and you sail through.
Also, don’t rush into lifetime commitment. Take your time to be sure of what your decision is because once you rush, disappointments are inevitable and you will pull out. Then you disappoint the family.
Remember that many people come to witness this day.

THE DETAILS >
Entourage
The red and gold dresses for the maids were a perfect fit and pick. Teamed with gold wedges, there was no other way to nail the look of the day.

Cake
With red ribbons at the base and bow tie adornments, the 12-tier cake cost Shs1.5m.

Bouquet
The bride’s bouquet was predominantly made of white roses and a few red ones. This matched her snow-white gown that fitted her body shape.

Décor
This was the most expensive item on the couple’s budget. It went for Shs10m. The service provider did not have most of the materials on standby.