Visitation day is vital for a child’s well-being

The school term is midway. Suffice to say, if you have a child in boarding school, visitation day is now on the cards. I was at Seeta High School, Mbalala campus on Sunday to visit my two beautiful young sisters. And it was a good experience. The girls were doing just fine. I got the opportunity of interacting with their teachers and this gave me the much needed feedback, not only on their academic stand but also on the general conduct. Most of the information the teachers gave me was useful. But the problem is that one of the girls was having some sort of trouble with the science subjects.

Luckily, I was present and together with the student and her class teacher, we got to the bottom of it. We were quick to identify the problems and came up with productive solutions going forward. I am sending her a new scientific calculator this week as she was quick to attribute her decline in Mathematics and Physics to the fact that her old calculator had got spoilt. Let us see which other excuse this darling will have after getting a new calculator!
It was a productive and much needed visit. The girls and I had the opportunity to mingle and catch up for a few hours. They were happy, and I suspect it was because I had carried more than enough ‘grub’ for them.

The irony
Some parents had carried the “whole supermarket” for their children. Others, no juice or bread. The economy is tough! Nonetheless they were there and looking at the students’ faces; after all, mum, dad or sister have showed up. So the party went on—parents petting their children, breaking into fits of endless laughter, and taking pictures.

But moving around the school, it turned out different. Some students’ parents had not turned up. They sat with dry lips and eyes glued to the gate. Many of them looked young, Senior Ones I presume. They didn’t smile. Turns out there isn’t much to smile about if your parents seem to have forgotten your visitation day. Even at 5pm when the school siren went off for parents to leave, these youngsters kept there. It was evident their parents were not about to show up. They sat perhaps because they could not bear the idea of having to walk back to dorm to face an empty box while their friends beamed with smiles. This broke my heart.

Come on, parents!
One wonders, why are most parents not going for their children’s visitation day? I posed this to Norah Tukamushaba, a mother of five, with three in boarding school. She informed me of financial struggles many parents are entangled in as a major reason visitation day is often scrapped off the calendar. She, however, went ahead to point out another interesting reason; some parents just do not think it is such a big deal.
“There are parents who have the money but when visitation day falls, they don’t attend. They prefer to send money and sometimes even send edibles and scholastic materials. They are too busy, or so they claim,” Tukamushaba reveals.

Henry Lugero, a senior teacher at Seeta High School, Mbalala campus, says broke or busy, these are not reason enough for a parent not to show up for their child’s visitation day. He believes parents must always have their children as a priority part of which their ability to find time on their busy schedule to be there for this one day. “Contrary to what many parents believe, visitation day is not about carrying a lot of edibles for the child. Or, bringing a lot of money. Carry a few things as your pocket size at that moment will dictate. The most important thing is your presence. There is more to a school visitation day than the drinks and eats,” Lugero explains.

The significance of visitation day
Lugero says, this day is one way for the parent to honour the school programme and a point of reconciliation between the parents, students and teachers.
He adds, “For quality education, the parents should not let education be a student-teacher affair. This is because a parent’s duty does not end at paying school fees but stay involved every step of the way.”
You get to talk to your child at a personal level. And you also get the opportunity to meet the teachers and get feedback on the child’s general performance. And in case of any challenges, better solutions will be borne because the teacher and parent will come up with solutions based on their combined knowledge of the student.

Going for visitation also has a psychological effect on the child. In Lugero’s view, a child who is visited will most likely feel more loved and cared for. This motivates them to perform better.
He sums it up by imploring all parents to always make it a point to turn up for visitation day. He also calls upon parents to ensure their visit is productive. Make sure you supplement on the teacher’s role by counselling and guiding your child accordingly.
“I think some parents should desist from conversations that may leave the student emotionally shaken.”

On the other hand
Children that are not visited feel bad about themselves. Sometimes their friends will even bully them about it. Such students are left sad as they feel isolated. And trust me this does not help to motivate them in class. More seriously also, such students may end up being tempted to break into the boxes of others to steal as they are in constant need. That is how much of an effect visitation day has on the child.