Why would you fight with your spouse? DEBATE

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By  Abdulaziizi K. Tumusiime

Posted  Sunday, December 8  2013 at  02:00

Marriage is built out of love and commitment but the day-to-day living with your loved one can result in some ugly (and loud!) moments. When you are in the middle of an argument with your spouse, it may feel like no one else knows your pain. But the truth is every couple fights and often about similar things. Abdulaziizi K. Tumusiime set out to find out what provokes couples to fight.

If you’re in a relationship – whether it’s marriage or dating – you will invariably, at times, find yourselves fighting. Couples have disagreements; it just comes with the territory. However, some fighting couples put the gloves on about anything and everything, to the point that not only their relationship suffers, but also their individual happiness. If you and your partner are warring more than you are loving, it’s time to take a look at why you do so and get solutions.

Justus Nuwarinda, Bodaboda cyclist
Provocation. I am a strong believer that there is no reason under the sun for a man to raise her hand against a woman save for when he is provoked to do so. If a woman slaps me the first and second time, I’ll be left with no alternative than striking back.

Annet Muhindo, Hair dresser.
Personality. There are men who are naturally short tempered or have anger management challenges and beat their wives out of this. When you lose your temper, the ability to make a rational decision eludes you. A man in such a situation will not think through the consequences of what they are about to do. It is only after leaving someone with a broken limb or sore eye that reality begins to sink in.

NabothTwinomugisha, Salesperson
Misusing her husband’s money. We are living in an era where times are hard, financially. So, imagine a man who has set up a business for his wife in order to supplement the family’s funds. Instead of managing the business well, the woman uses the money to fund her desires like going to the salon. A man will be tempted to beat such a woman so as to put her in order.

Isaac Egesa, Waiter
Stress. A woman is supposed to be the source of comfort to her husband after a long and strenuous day. Some women behave otherwise. They are a source of more stress to an already stressed man. Such a husband is more likely to behave violently.

Elizabeth Namayanja, Shop attendant
Adultery. A man may bear with any of his wife’s vices except cheating on him. To do so is to send a message that his not a man enough. It is an insult to his masculinity. Thus, he will be prone to show his emotions by beating up his wife.

RachealKisakye, student.
Poor communication skills. The best way to solve any misunderstandings in a marriage is through communication, that is, a man and a woman ought to sit themselves down and discuss. A man who beats his wife is one who is so weak at communication that they find assaulting their wife as a more appealing solution.

A man’s upbringing
We are all brought up in different environments which often shape the way we behave or relate with people. A man who is brought up in a family where her father beats up the mother is more likely to do the same to his wife. It was etched on his mind that violence is the best way to get things right.
Gerald Nambale, Businessman

According to the bible, a man is the head of the family but he is not supposed to abuse this authority. A man who beats his wife is a proud one. This pride drives him to despise his partner as one who is not worth being talked to in order to resolve any outstanding marital problems.

Margaret Faith, Street preacher