Why do students date lecturers?

Universities are hotbeds of relationships, from everlasting true love to awkward one-night stands. However, relationships between lecturers and students are pretty common and rarely prohibited by some universities.
“I regret falling in love with one of my lecturers during second year. It ended shortly in my final semester. However, this had already left its mark on my university experience,” explains Harriet (not real names) a former university student.
Despite moments of happiness, Harriet says this affected her both socially and academically as she started dedicating less time to her studies and missed out on lectures, especially those that were taught by her lover.

“Moving out with a lecturer was fine with me because I loved him and thought I would balance studies with him. However, everything became of less importance as course works were completed half-heartedly and I would spend time during lectures fantasising about a future with him.”
“I did not take advantage of the fact that he was my faculty dean. But when I realised that my grades had declined, I had the confidence he would take care of my results as he had promised me. But it didn’t happen,” she remembers. “I really loved him, even with his empty promises.”

As a result, Harriet didn’t graduate with the rest of her classmates.
Kenneth Mukasa, a former student of Kyambogo University, says it would be better if students kept away from such relationships because at the end of the day they are not fruitful.
“One thing I got to realise is that university students desire to have everything without having to hustle. That is why some will miss lectures and tests thinking they will simply pay the lecturers to get them marks, or offer them sex,” he says, adding that love for material things has driven many students into the lion’s den.

Samurah Namuggabe, a student in her final year at Kyambogo University, says students wish to associate with a class of people way older than them, who they think can provide for their needs in terms of upkeep.
“We all come from different backgrounds, but because the competition in terms of having a smart phone, clothes and shoes, some students will prefer to go on a date with lecturers so as to keep up with the standards of living,” she says.
Namuggabe adds that at times students get themselves in a dilemma not because they love their lecturers, but simply because the lecturers keep chasing after the students.
“In case you reject them, then you will most likely win yourself a retake or he will make life at campus a living hell for you,” she says.

Why it happens
“Personally, I do not think it is right to have such relationships. But we cannot deny the fact that they do happen,” says Doreen Metta, a university lecturer.
She says while at campus, different students have different motives and goals. There is a type of student who is there just to go through the system simply because their parents have paid tuition and they need to graduate and go.

Such students are lazy, she says, adding that they end up involving themselves in exploitative relationships with their lecturers.
“University students would prefer to date someone with an income to foot their bills, so they tend to look out for a potential partner and the nearest is always the lecturer,” she says, but adds that it can at times be genuine love with no strings a touched and on many occasions students have got married to lecturers.
“All parties are held responsible in this case and each must get to know their limits,” she concludes.

Their experiences

Racheal Nalweyiso, student at Mubs
“Some students will find themselves dating their lecturers simply because they lack attention from their parents. They don’t feel appreciated enough by parents who tend to reject them, assuming they are now grown up to face whatever challenges. So if a student finds this lecturer who pays attention to them, appreciates and is concerned whenever they miss their lectures, students will later find comfort in their lecturers.

Aidah Kirabo, former student at Crane media
“It is not right and I would not recommend any student to engage in it. But different students have different reasons of which each believes their reasons are understandable. For example, one of my friends in some other university says she needed money to clear tuition because her mother a get involved in an accident and would not raise the remaining half of her tuition, yet she was not ready to register for a dead semester.

Allan Ssembuya, former student at Muk:
“Some boys at campus will choose to have it for fun and flirt around, especially with lecturers within their age bracket. They do not need the marks or money, but only need to prove a point to fellow students and at times they bet against it.

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