Ode to Corruption (Uganda’s Gravy Train)

We’ll prosecute; we’ll act/ We have Penal Code Act/ And Prevention of Corruption Act/ We’ll invoke Leadership Code Act/ Or Inspectorate of Government Act/ There’s a National Audit Act...

Some live on dollar a day/ Shopping malls make my day/Won’t you make hay?/While system lives another day?

Taxes! You pay taxes?/ You’ll forever ride in taxis/ Only fools give access/To tax-lady to assess.

Global Fund, there’s no refund/ Chogm monies, not my worries/ Nusaf’s where he surfs/ Naads fits our big life fads.

Football went to the dogs/ Boxing’s followed the pigs/ Athletics run to the frogs/ Will rugby suit the warthogs?

Applying for a visa?/ Just come to the ‘misa’/ Prayer for a million/ Is my pastor’s bullion.

Donors, oh mighty donors/ Who needs your dollars?/ Now we’ve found oil/ Nicely it’ll come to the boil.

We’re setting up camp/ In the wetland swamp/ Because they’re investors/ Who cares about protestors.

Forest! Cut the forest!/ Animals don’t need more rest/ Plants are set for harvest/ Big capital shall invest.

Junk choppers just won’t fly/ But skyscrapers, they go fly/ Cash we store in their ceiling/ To hell with how you’re feeling.

National foreign reserves/ Uganda does not deserve/ At high table we’ll serve/ Dollars peasants can’t have.

Who actually still conserves?/ Who needs Central Bank reserves?/ Loyalty we have to preserve/ Though not the road reserve.

Justice’s delayed; it’s denied/ You are in full denial/ This is but a sham trial/ It’s not theft, but a mistrial.

Which Nodding Disease?/ You can’t be nodding off!/ It’s no time to sleep/ It’s just our time to eat.

It’s the party primaries/ We’re like kids in primary/ Class prefects do buy votes/ For your vote, what’s your quote?

Oh brother, dear brother/ How’s father and mother?/ This office’s full of brothers/ Doesn’t matter, nobody bothers.