Heart to Heart
I get it when girls don’t get the BFF stuff
Posted Thursday, August 28 2014 at 01:00
Remember that group of boys that used to sit at the back, making silly irritating comments whenever the teacher was not in? We had such a gang in class. We were nine, and I was the only girl. Yes, I am such a boys’ girl. It is no wonder my best friend, (we call them BFFs these days) is a boy and so is the closest one after him.
Calvin and I are pretty close. I know his family, he knows mine, how much he earns, saves and spends, his favourite dish, places and I can account for his whereabouts almost all the time. We check out eateries together, go to the movies and are together most of the time. He knows my boyfriend and I know the girls that are interested in him, those he is interested in and who he is seeing. But we don’t like each other romantically and we would share a bed and nothing would happen, I know that because once I shared a bed with him and yes, nothing happened.
The people who don’t know us well ask if we are an item. But no.
Once at school, my BFF got a girlfriend, Christine. We were all in the same class. Initially, his girlfriend tried to be close to me. It was weird, but later made sense when I learnt that she wanted to learn more about him. That would be fine and sweet, even if her questions didn’t sound like she was spying. She wanted to know if he had had a girlfriend before, cheated while in a relationship. I refused to answer any of them and told her to ask Calvin himself. Suddenly she was secretly hating and spying on me.
In class, Calvin sent chits to her and I. Mine were always more and longer, full of silly things that left me suppressing laughter. Christine got one of my deskmates to see if the chits I received were in Calvin’s handwriting. She said nothing. Once when we went on a school trip, I asked Calvin to buy a rose for his girlfriend. Unknown to me he bought two; one for me and one for her. Somehow the girlfriend came to know about it and created a scene. I ignored her. She later confronted Calvin, who assured her that we are just friends. They broke up after school, and there has been such drama from other girls since.
I can understand why a girl would feel insecure with a girl like me around her boyfriend, and that is why when I was older, I spoke to the boys and told them when there was a girl in the picture, she should come first. But the bond doesn’t reduce. To them, I am as good as a boy; help them out when they are broke and I will help them find a car if they need one to impress the girl.
Girls, most times, your man’s female BFF is on your side. If you treat them well and understand her place in his life, she will make sure he treats you right; if you misbehave, trust me the BFF won’t have your back. Just trust your man!