Heart to Heart

I’m 23, he is 38 ...is he too old?

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Posted  Thursday, September 4  2014 at  01:00
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The problem
Dear Hear to Heart, I am a 23-year-old girl just out of campus and looking forward to a serious relationship. Problem is that all the men I am currently dating do not seem serious. There is, however, this particular 38-year-old, once married but separated (understandable). He has two children from his previous relationship and is serious about starting over with me. I have not consented to his proposal yet. My worry is that we have way much of a big age difference between us. Please advise me.
Robina
your solutions

Do not be desperate for marriage, make your money first. Most men between 25 and 30 want casual relationships, not wives! Why rush?
Recheal

In any relationship, never ignore red flags raised in the first month. That man should be somewhat your dad or uncle’s age. Do not be in a rush to be in a relationship. Start chasing your career. Believe me a relationship below 26, unless God prepared it, will never be fun.
Jacob

Your agemates are just playing with you. Aren’t you aware that girls grow faster than men? Ask yourself why he is coming for a 23-year-old yet there are women of his age. Go on with him, but he should be serious. Do some research on him.
Brian

Girlfriend, age is just a number. If the man makes you happy and adds value to your life, say yes already. Besides I assume he is mature, a trait that is rare with men in 20s.
Susan

You have enough time to make possible and meaningful relationships. It is too early to start letting things like men and their problems bother you. First make yourself happy solely.
Robina
At 23, you are good to go. Otherwise, one day you will wake up and you are 38, and your agemates won’t consider you then either.
Shargy

Don’t dare! Age would not be a problem only if he never had children. Wait for another man who has never been married.
Alex

You will not find a serious relationship in your age bracket dear, there is no big gap. Others are marrying men 15 to 20 years older. Munange women grow faster in appearance than men, the one you think is older will look younger than you in a few years of marriage. It is your choice.
Margaret

Look here Robina, just at 23 you are desperate. Let me ask you; Do you think about how you are going to be after 20 years? Please be patient, wait for a man of your age. Don’t force nature. It is true you finished campus but you are too young to get married to a man of that age.
Joseph

Bear in mind that in a relationship, age is just a ratio. What matters is true love. It is, however, good for you to bear in mind that you are not getting married to one who is five years older, because it will bore you so much.
Emmanuel

Age is just a number. A 15-year age difference is not bad. If you love him, marry him.
Jawhar

Please don’t hesitate, age is a ratio, go ahead if he is serious.
Ismail

If you love him, age difference does not count. The more you delay, know that time will not be on your side.
Tonny

Those old men are not also serious.
Fatuma

You girls are never serious, you are going to reach there and what you expect is not what you will find.
Faida

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