Thursday July 5 2018

Stand warned, mistresses rarely become wives

Stand warned mistresses rarely become wives

It is true that some mistresses might actually find their way to the aisle but the probability is really low. COURTESY PHOTO 

By Christine Nakalungi

“If you were the mistress while he was still married, chances are, he will not trust you with a home.”

It is true that some mistresses might actually find their way to the aisle but believe me; the probability is really low. She has been dating a man who is separated from his wife for three years but he had never officially got divorced. She was convinced that he was ready to spend the rest of his life with her.

So she kept the relationship going and closed all the other suitors outside the door. But whenever they talked about taking matters to a more official level, he had a perfect excuse to give, “My divorce has not finalised yet, we will get married the moment it does.” She stayed put and patiently prayed that the divorce ties would be broken and that she would get to wear that white dress and walk down the aisle.

Well, that was her dream until she unintentionally stumbled on heart breaking documents. The court had actually granted the gentleman divorce from his past marriage but for reasons we could imagine, he kept it a secret from the mistress and used it as a shield from all her ‘marry me’ arrows. At that point, tears could not heal the bruised heart, confronting him would open up doors for more lies so she swallowed her pain and just secretly ended the relationship but before she did, she wanted to confirm and so she looked for the ex-wife.

When she asked her about the divorce, the woman smiled at her and said, “My dear, you wanted the man more than I did so I let him go. But what did you think? Did you expect him to jump from a flying pan into the fire? There is a reason why you were a mistress. You were just a snack and not the main course and no man settles for a snack. Be wise and get yourself a man who will not always see you as a second option.” These were hurtful words to hear but it was the truth.

If a man crumbles out of a broken marriage, he feels so suffocated and all that he wants is a breath of fresh air and freedom. So, if you are hoping that he will marry you in a blink of an eye, my dear sister, you better buckle up because this is going to be a long and tough journey for you.

Besides, there is a belief that if he cheated with you, he will cheat on you. So if you were the mistress while he was still married, chances are he will not trust you with a home. People who do not respect marriage do not deserve one.

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