We believed in abstinence till marriage

I started on a journey of silently putting my case forward. I had never been on an exclusive date with her so I colluded with a friend to dare her to a date with me. I played a catalyst in this. And boom, that was our first date together

Thursday January 21 2016

Bob Ambrose Nuwagira and Jocelyn Leletu

Bob Ambrose Nuwagira and Jocelyn Leletu 

By Edgar Batte

His story

How and when did you meet Jocelyn?
I met Leletu at Makerere Campus. She was in Africa Hall and I was in Nsibirwa (State) Hall. She was studying law and I was doing IT. We were casual friends for more than five years before I had any feelings for her. We went to the same church, were in the same Student group (Prime Time at The Pool), so that is how we became casual friends with her.

As friends, what traits bonded you?
We became close when after graduating from campus. I was staying in Makerere Kagugube and she was also in the neighbourhood as she finalised her Post-Graduate Diploma at the Law Development Centre. She hosted our church’s cell group in the area.

What did you share that brought you together first as friends?
We were both Born Again Christians and both had a passion for youth. We are both fun-loving people, shared the same values of chastity and we were both in the same cell group.

Do you remember how you became friends?
Not quite. I guess we found ourselves in the same community. We had joined the cell at the same time and that is how our friendship begun.

How did she bring out the meaning of friendship to you?
She is almost my opposite. She is very attentive to detail, keeps in contact with all her friends and has a very caring personality. She will remember your birthday. She will be there when you need help. She is very hospitable. I started to notice she was different. She was a real lady with so much responsibility.

What was the transformation like from a friend to a lover?
In all this, I started to realise she was some special damsel. She had great qualities, was intelligent but I had reservations for lawyers. There was always this talk of them being assertive and controlling. But I came to realise she was not in that description. She is a beautiful, humble, jolly, smart Christian girl who was really worth the risk.

What did you consider a risk?
There were so many things at stake. I felt like I was risking ruining our casual friendship if I expressed my well-kept attraction for her. I risked being considered to have joined her cell group with motives. I risked rejection.

When and how did you profess your love to her?
I started on a journey of silently putting my case forward. I had never been on an exclusive date with her so I colluded with a friend to dare her to a date with me. I played a catalyst in this. And boom, that was our first date together. We had great time at the date... just talking about ourselves and really nothing much...but for me it broke for barriers.

From then on, we started to communicate, started to pay each other visits and the breakthrough was when we both attended a life skills training camp in Kako, in Masaka, that we really got to share much more about life, love and what envisioned as the future. That is when I realised I had a focused and intelligent girl before me and if I did not give it a try, I would always regret it. Of course, being a comedian did not make things easy. I did not think anyone would find me serious. I perhaps thought she would think I was joking.

What did you do about it to win her over?
Many had actually told me if I ever told them something serious, I would be interpreted as being in the act of doing comedy. I started out with a purposive strategy, breaking into her circle, creating more time to meet up and talk more and being consistent.

What was her reaction?
I realised she was a little cautious but I never gave up. I was up to it and slowly, we became free with one another.

What did you do to get her to trust you and give in to you?
I just remained consistent in my actions and efforts. I had decided to test the water with both feet.

What did you feel when she said yes to start a committed relationship with you?
It was a great feeling. This was after a full month. I had resigned my fate to whatever her decision was. I was relieved as well. It is not good for man to be in a state of uncertainty for more than three days.

After opening up to you, what was your next conversation?
I told her how happy I was and I guess we called it a day. In fact she was the one who had taken me out for lunch.

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