Without a ring, you are not his wife

A couple exchanges wedding rings. FILE PHOTO

What you need to know:

“Without a marriage certificate, you cannot claim that you are married to someone.”

If you have been around a pregnant woman, you know that it is not easy to give birth. Every woman deserves love and respect if she gave you a child to call your own but no, some men just do not see that as a reason to return the favour and maybe formalise the relationship.

They instead marry someone else, and leave the poor baby mama with a bruised heart.

Who is to blame? Dear baby mama, I understand you loved that man so much that you were willing to give him a child and hoped for a future together. After one child, you moved in and technically offered yourself fully to this man. Years passed and he never brought up the ‘marry me’ topic but you hang in there with belief that one day he will.

Well, he never did and before you knew it, you were pregnant again. You gave up the hopes of ever walking down the isle but instead concentrated on raising the children with this man.

Well, maybe you missed the clues because he went ahead and got himself a ‘worthy wife’ and now you are claiming and threatening to sue him and the bride to be but in reality, he has never belonged to you. Your families have never officially endorsed the relationship and the registrar of marriages does not have you in records.

Even if the government wanted to intervene, you have no basis so you wail as you watch another woman live your dream. Lesson; if you go to school, study and do all classroom tests but do not sit for the final exam, you are the only one that can confirm your academic efforts and are not any different from the one who dropped out earlier.

For without a document, you cannot claim that you studied law or medicine and in this case, without a marriage certificate, you cannot claim that you are married to someone. And to the baby dad who dumped your baby mama of five children to marry another woman, the laws might not castigate you but that does not mean you are innocent. You would have told her that she was not the woman you wished to marry early enough so that her hopes are not raised.

But all in all, if someone does not marry you, you have no right to fight over him or her. It is sad to say but it is the ugly truth. Claim that ring now or regret later as he gives it to another woman.