Help your child deal with exam stress

Major school exams where the results have potential to determine one’s career path and overall success in life come with a lot of anxiety and stress. It’s just the middle of the first term but the amount of pressure felt by parents and children in candidate classes is astounding.
“From the first week of the term we were bombarded with homework. By the time my son comes home, he is too tired to even finish a meal without his eyes closing involuntarily. I don’t know how we will go through this pressure moreover for a whole year,” laments Michael Muketa, a father of a Primary Seven pupil. Candidate classes are highly stressful for both students and guardians because while the exams test knowledge and skills, they also inadvertently test their ability to cope with pressure.

Amounting pressure
Psychologists point out that this kind of pressure if mismanaged can lead to stress and altered learning behaviour. Even worse, it can make the smartest students do poorly in their exams. When a young person is stressed, they will go over and over an idea in their mind. The more they think about failure the more distracted they will get because naturally when we feed negative thoughts they hang around and grow. Studies show that stress can affect memory by increasing cognitive load. This reduces our effectiveness in storing ideas, which means some students will struggle to perform at their best during exams.

According to Evelyn Kharono Lufafa, a counselling psychologist with Suubi Medical Centre Kiira, exam stress manifests in different ways among different children depending on their underlying causes. These include, panic, anxiety, too much or too little sleep, change in eating habits, among others.
“It is vital for parents to know their children well and keep a close watch on their daily moods. They can help reduce on the exam stress by ensuring that there is a conducive environment at home,” says Lufafa.

Being organised saves the day
She further advises parents to guide the children into planning, organising and setting a reading time table to reduce the exam stress. “Spend light moments with their children and keep the home atmosphere light and humorous. Provide a well-balanced meal with fruits and less quick foods. Inculcate a sense of achievement in children so that they gain confidence,” she adds.
Sophie Gombya, a counsellor further underscores the impact exams can have on teachers, students and family. “Everyone is under pressure to produce the best results, so they want to cram preparations that should have been done in about six years in just one year. This kind of scrambling leads to stress and breakdown,” says Gombya. She advises parents to provide a balance between study and rest because it is critical in supporting high academic performance. Encourage the candidates to have adequate regular sleep, exercise and relaxation.

Take advantage of the moment
Gombya further observes that this stress can sometimes be beneficial to the candidates; that parents should seize it and use it as a teachable moment. “Use this chance to teach children that life will always give them these kinds of tests and equip them with the techniques they need to get through this period. This is not the time to remind them of their past failures but rather reaffirm their worth,” she adds.
Janat Kafumbe, a teacher, says it is good for teachers not to constantly mention the exams; how difficult they might be and the consequences.

“By this stage, many candidates understand all too well that “everything counts” in their study, and just get frustrated when teachers hound them about the exams,” she says.
Parents should remember and instill it in their children that exams do not define a person’s whole future; they are just one event in a student’s life. Stress is normal when we engage in something challenging. We feel stress because we are vulnerable that we may not perform well. Teach your child that this uncomfortable feeling is good because it means you are challenging yourself.
Tune in to their emotions by asking them how they feel. Don’t criticise or try to protect them from the challenges they are facing, instead listen and encourage them. Teach them not to fear failure because there is not one perfect plan but there are multiple pathways to success.

What the counsellor says
Sophie Gombya, a counsellor further underscores the impact exams can have on teachers, students and family. “Everyone is under pressure to produce the best results, so they want to cram preparations that should have been done in about six years in just one year. This kind of scrambling leads to stress and breakdown,” says Gombya. She advises parents to provide a balance between study and rest because it is critical in supporting high academic performance. Encourage the candidates to have adequate regular sleep, exercise and relaxation.

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