Boys need men to mentor and nuture them
I had not slept too well that night. The seemingly comfortable hotel bed affected my sleep. The mattress was that type that turned into a boat of sorts when one slept.
Finally towards the wee hours, I fell asleep, only to be woken up by the phone ringing.
‘Hello mommy?’
By the ring tone alone, I knew who was calling. Often times, he calls just to see how his mother is doing, a gesture that she deeply appreciates.
It has been said that the relationship between mothers and their sons is deeper than words can say. Perhaps it is the same way any father feels and relates with his daughter.
I was having a chat with a friend who has a much older son. She mentioned something that has stuck on my mind since.
She said that no matter the amazing bond that a mother shares with her son, every boy needs a male relationship where they can be vulnerable and yet accountable.
That relationship can’t be with their mother because a mother will not and can never understand men issues no matter how great a relationship they share. She then continued to say that if the boy has a resident father, then that would be the best person to play the role but if the father wasn’t readily available, it was essential to find a trustworthy male figure to walk and journey with the young man especially through their developmental years.
She pointed out that many a time, the boy child has been neglected so to speak, as efforts are made towards growing and grooming the girl child.
While many boys grapple with the waters of the changing landscape as they transition from little boys into teenagers and then young adults, if they are not guided and nurtured, many find themselves lost, confused and prone to peer pressure and its related challenges.
I listened very silently, taking note of her words.
I thought about my amazing son who often calls just to check on me, I realized he needed more than just a loving mother.
He needs male mentors and friends to teach him how to wade the waters of the teen years which are knocking already.
