Dealing with delicate balances
I ran through the corridor as fast as my small legs could take me. I got into the lift and prayed fervently that the men wearing green overalls wouldn’t be there because chances of meeting them carrying a dead body to the mortuary are usually high. My heart races so fast at the site of a dead body.
Those are some of my earliest and most profound memories of my mother’s work place National Referral Hospital –Mulago. Right from childhood, I knew I would never work in a hospital. I dreaded everything in there for many years.
The other day, I had a discussion with boys on what they wanted to become in the future and why.
One boy shared that his largely absent doctor father - his words -wanted him to study and become a doctor or if that didn’t happen, he should become a pilot like his grandfather.
The challenge though was that the boy not only hates anything to do with hospitals, he also fears blood and any other body fluids including his own. He also hates and fears heights. So the idea of flying aeroplanes has never appealed to him either.
He wants to be a footballer and has wanted to be so all his 18 years. He even knows the university he wants to attend that offers sports science as a complete course in eastern Uganda.
Listening to the boys arguing amongst themselves reminded me of my younger self. It would have been a death sentence if I had been forced to study medicine.
One of my children wants to be an international footballer. He breathes, dreams, and is always talking football. My other child wants the medical field.
What does a parent do? Should the parent stick to their guns and push the children to walk their parent’s dreams or should the children be at liberty to pursue their own ambitions? Is there a middle line in these extremes?
As the conversation continued, I started to see that there was a huge gap in understanding and in communication between the boys and their fathers. As a parent how are you handling this delicate line of parenting?
Yes you birthed this child and they are only six years old but they enjoy being with and taking care of animals so much that they will hate you for killing the chicken.
You dreamt of having the biggest law firm with all your children working as partners and yet your amazing first son wants to pursue music. What does a parent do in these circumstances?
May God give us the wisdom to understand the purpose and destiny of our precious little ones. May we guide them without interrupting their God-aligned future.
