Parents’ talks are not in vain

Friday January 17 2020

Seated together as we went out of town for the burial of the father of a good friend, my neighbour mentioned something that caught my attention.
She said to me: “Be a talking parent. Talk, talk and keep talking. Do not stop talking to your child. Your words will bear fruit one day.”
I sat quietly taking in her subtle but powerful message as she continued to narrate how she still hears the words her mother always said to her, 15 years after her passing. She continued to say her mother had the driest sense of humour but many of her words continue to guide her daughter, a mother herself, of two amazing boys. Her words made a lot of sense to me. Firstly, because they were from the intense experiences of a fellow mother but also because they were comforting to me. I do not know about you but as a parent, very many times, I have been frustrated with a child wondering whether my endless talking has any impact at all. Sometimes it feels like you are talking to a wall because whatever you are saying appears to only be going through one ear into the next and then out. There are many times you have spoken with and at the child and they have looked on with blank faces as if asking themselves when you are actually planning on shutting up. It was a breath of fresh air to be assured that all my words actually count. That your words are the seeds being planted into your child, which one day will bear fruit. Much more fruit than you can ever imagine. So, this morning, as I carefully thought through my narrative yet again, I was not deflated and I knew my words were powerful. I was even more careful about the exact choice of words because not only were they seeds, but they needed to be excellent seeds. I emphatically reminded the child that they are excellent individuals who needed to be responsible and accountable for every move they made. I reminded them that although they were a star, it was not my responsibility to polish the star into a shining state. May you be deliberate and a talking parent, this year. May you speak words of life to your children. We reap that which we sow.

mirembeabola@gmail.com

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