How do we remain discordant?
Dr, I have been married for 12 years and I have three children. Recently, my husband got burnt by a Nairobi fly and for good measure the family doctor did an HIV test. I was found HIV negative but my husband was found HIV positive. How do I make sure I stay negative? Angella
One of the main reasons leading to HIV infections in women is economic vulnerability, which many times causes them to think that they have no or little say in their sex lives.
Therefore, when a woman runs away from her husband (with or without children) she may not easily survive out there, hence running back despite the risk of health and other consequences.
What you call a Nairobi fly burn could be Herpes Zoster infection (Kisipi) which can happen to anyone but especially when a person’s ability to fight infections is reduced (immunosuppression) including when one has HIV infection. This could be the reason the doctor chose to check both of you for HIV infection.
When one of the sexual partners has an HIV infection and the other does not (discordant couples), there is always a danger of infecting the one who is negative if the couple continues having unprotected sex.
Unfortunately in Uganda when discordant couples are found, with people thinking that Aids chooses who to infect and who not to infect, the couple will continue having unprotected sex with a false belief that infection will not happen to the resistant one.
It is important that you get proper counselling from a qualified HIV/Aids counsellor or doctor.
The counsellor /doctor is likely to counsel you alone first and then your husband also alone and eventually you together with your husband.
The doctor will also immediately start your husband on drugs that treat HIV (Anti Retroviral drugs) for your husband’s own good health (and yours) apart from advising proper and consistent use of condoms for sex with you to avoid getting infected with HIV.
Without counselling and use of ARVS, there is always a danger of your husband infecting you.
