How do I deal with a boss who publicly humiliates me?

How does an employee deal with an employer who constantly reminds them that they are doing them a favour by employing them and are constantly publicly humiliating them in front of fellow employees and subordinates? Fiona

Dear Fiona,
You have two options - to either get the courage and speak with your supervisor or approach human resources to help you address the matter. Not addressing the matter is not an option as this becomes a habit and can quickly turn into bullying. Whichever option you choose, you will need to ask yourself a fundamental question. What impact does your supervisor’s behaviour have on you? What is being said and done to you? In addressing the matter, the focus should be on how they are making you feel and how that feeling is impacting the quality of your work and your self-esteem. You will need to be very specific in describing the impact and must have very clear examples of what was said and done.

Documenting bad behaviour allows both you and the HR to identify a pattern of negative behaviour that can then be managed comprehensively. If you have an opportunity and are confident you can manage the discussion, it is always best to speak to your supervisor directly. Describe the incident and then steer the conversation by saying what you want and you do not want.

Structuring the discussion in this format means you are both discussing positive behaviour and the impact it has on both your work and your self-esteem. Supervisors are sometimes more responsive if matters are handled direct. It sometimes changes their opinion of a person if you address the issue yourself. If you decide to manage the situation through the HR, make sure you provide accurate information so they can address the root cause of bad behaviour.

Caroline Mboijana
Managing Director
The Leadership Team (U)
[email protected]