BY THE WAY: Love is going to be in the air soon

Sunday January 29 2012

By Peter Kakoma

Valentines is around the corner and several men are breaking out in a sweat. Nights at bars are being spent going over what would be a great gift for their significant other.

Every time you walk into a bar and find men huddled around speaking in hushed tones and lowering their voices whenever you draw near, they are not talking about soccer or politics. Or soccer politics even. They are simply going over the different gifts they could get for their special person this Valentines.

Katongole will suggest that they could buy aprons since their spouses like to cook. Jason will suggest that since his special person is always complaining about how the gadgets at home always seem to malfunction, a screwdriver set would be a practical gift.

Friend, I’ll save you the trouble. My time on the internet is not for nothing. I present practical gifts that will make your special person’s heart pop. In a good way.

Life-sized effigy of her favourite politician
If your special person is into politics and you have seen how her eyes light-up whenever the TV cameras turn to a particular politician, this gift is perfect. Get a good shot of the politician, go to Katwe and have an effigy made. Since it is two weeks to D-day and the global effigy-production manual clearly states that it takes eight days to make one, you are in luck. Put the newspaper down right now and run to Katwe. Run, don’t walk since we’ve seen images on TV about what will happen to you if you walk. Or first read the rest of the article and decide what gift suits her best.

Bulletproof vest
If your special person uses the streets of Kampala, this gift is ideal. It may be a bit pricy and my internet source wasn’t able to specify where one can get it locally but if you really love her, this is an ideal gift. You have seen news reports about what people are doing with guns out there. Keep her safe. She can wear it whenever she wears a dress. I don’t think a bulletproof vest can fit under a tiny top but the jury’s still out.

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