Diary of a Kampala bachelor: When the key goes missing

I have in the past had as many stories surrounding a house key. Apparently it cements a relationship, and no one has successfully planted such ideas in the minds of our girls like Hollywood.
In one of the movie scenes, a man will almost bend a knee as he presents her one of his house keys hanging on a chain she can freely wear as a necklace.
But besides giving girls keys to show that things are getting serious, for guys that are as far from sharing their space, the key remains a big part of their life.

The house being that space where men go to have their ‘me’ time, it is as important for boychild to always know where his house keys are.
And yet often, on those Monday mornings, you will wake up without remembering where you placed the keys, it is usually at that time when you finally stepping out to start the day.

Then you will check under chairs, the bed, flip the carpet in vain - funny thing, these keys are usually in the least suspected place.
Last week I was in the exact same spot, just that this time, I was not locked in the house, I was outside.

Imagine coming from an outing on Saturday night or probably Sunday morning and realising you do not have a key, that look through a curtain opening, you can see your chair, your interior but you can not get in.
Past midnight, I had fewer options so I checked into the nearest lodge. And there are too many bad things about those places, for instance, their sandals can choose to be weird, one day you will be given a room where a pair is only made up of the left leg sandals or double colours, like a blue and red one.

Sometimes we easily make peace with the tiny soap bars but it is hard to make peace with the looks you will always receive while exiting a lodge, it is like everyone assumes they know what happened in your room.
In fact, my sorry self could hardly take all that in, my landlord was vacationing with the family, so I could only try him on Monday morning but instead of lodging day two, I resorted to looking for people that could house me on Sunday.

And trust guys that are not married, it is like they believe single guys feed poorly that every single place we visit, people their want to feed us until we ask for forgiveness.
It was the same thing that happened when I went to pick a spare key from the landlord, he sat me down and asked the maid to make breakfast, “make it heavy, he is single.”
And just like that, by 10am on Monday, as people were settling into their day schedules, I was busy being fed, all because I lost a body part, my house key.