Where is my parent?
What you need to know:
- A child who asks his separated parent, ‘when am I going to see you again?’ is heartbreaking. Another who confuses his baby-sitter with his father is a sad fact at a tender age.
Currently on a visit in Europe, and with Christmas around the corner, the trees are decorated, streets are lit and Christmas markets are blooming all over the place. All seems great outwardly, but what about inwardly? Is it truly a season of joy, love and unity for all?
My nephew, a student in high school does baby-sitting for his pocket money. In one of the homes, there are two little boys, living with their mother who is divorced. When time allows, the children get to see their father on weekends.
My nephew told us that a few weeks ago, he took the children to the swimming pool, they met some other children and one of them asked the boys if my nephew was their father. The younger boy nodded and then ran to him saying: “Papa!Papa!” From then onwards the boy kept calling him Papa, so did we when we wanted to tease him.
A few light moments created there, but the bitter truth is the big number of children in Europe, and unfortunately, in many parts of the world are living in single parent homes.
It is hard to determine the impact of this type of household on the physiology of children growing up in it. With today’s lifestyle where both parents have to work to earn a decent living, it is already hard to raise a family where all elements work hand in hand.
This creates a balanced education for the children, one where father and mother each play their role on daily basis, sailing with their offspring through the rough waters of life. So one can only imagine a single parent having to face it all, most of the time alone.
Some couples say their daily arguments and disagreements have a worse effect on children than the divorced. I consider this a lame excuse. Two adults who decide to form a family, should be reminded that once these innocent children are brought to this world, they are fully responsible for their wellbeing.
This may include closing an eye on their ego and comfort, each sacrificing a part to create a warm home for their children.
There are of course some hopeless cases that include violence and addiction where compromise may bring negative results, so separation seems the only way.
A child who asks his separated parent, ‘when am I going to see you again?’ is heartbreaking. Another who confuses his baby-sitter with his father is a sad fact at a tender age. Worst of all is what I heard from a teenager brought up in such a household: “we may have both parents alive, but we feel partially orphaned.”
So is it a merry Christmas for all?
