What if God chooses Mr Museveni again in 2021?

Alan Tacca

If you have followed my arguments, under President Museveni, Uganda’s trademark nightmare, politically motivated crime, remains; whether it is the State and the ruling elite acting as barbarians, or the Opposition imitating the barbarians.

Two, President Museveni acts so slowly, you would think he has two full centuries to deliver Uganda to a heaven that only he knows.
Three, although Mr Museveni sings about modernisation and industrialisation, he does not seem to know how.

And now, four: When President Museveni said he was not working for Ugandans, but for himself as a freedom fighter and for his family, he was in fact inadvertently expressing a peculiar form of frustration. He could not understand how so many ordinary citizens were evidently not eternally and unquestioningly grateful to him. He, therefore, had a ‘good’ reason not to work for them.

When God is deemed a living creature – and King – He, too, gets greatly annoyed by any hint of irreverence.

However, in this guise as a living creature, albeit elusive and devoid of any measurable or detectable substance, God has a box of enviable abilities; like the exclusive ability to make other living creatures; or the ability to see and hear everything in the entire universe at all times.

One moment He is fabricating an odd human with both a penis and a vagina in Timbuktu, and at the same moment He is calmly watching a bishop raping a young boy in New York. At exactly that moment He is also calmly watching His angels recording things in the Book of Life and in the Book of Death.

You understand, don’t you? It is fools who say there is no God.
It follows, therefore, that the correct path for the believer is a pattern and a habit of absurd reasoning.

Now, the most absurd, the most muddled reasoning about the future of the Ugandan presidency that I have heard is from an ‘apostle’, Mr Joseph Serwadda.

The apostle’s credentials are solid. He hears and gets instructions directly from God. For instance, God has specifically instructed him to serve as apostle until 2040 AD, and no more. So, logically, God has already decided that the apostle will be alive at least up to 2040, and must retire – or die – after that.

Never mind the paradoxical provision the apostle makes: that he will serve and retire in 2040, if (if) he is still alive, leaving room for fools to conclude that he is not sure whether he will be alive in 2040. Does the ‘apostle’ secretly acknowledge that the date (2040) is just a personal fancy?

So, when the apostle maintains that it is God who decides – and who already knows – the next president, and when exactly that change will come, and that it is God’s prophets who are told of this divine position and who proclaim it (as in the Bible), then fools like me, in a country like Uganda, must be extremely afraid.

Every theocracy tends towards fascism. Even Heaven, the ultimate theocracy ruled by God himself, is only possible after a genocide; after the greater mass of humanity has been exterminated or thrown in a torture chamber.

As I have argued in the last three articles, mortal wisdom suggests that Mr Museveni should retire in 2021. But if he is reinstated by divine command (or by the fancy of God’s prophets!) rather than a democratic process, then the features of tomorrow’s repression will not even be open to challenge in the courts of mortal judges.

Mr Tacca is a novelist, socio-political commentator.
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