Does threatening your spouse’s mistress ever work?

Thursday July 23 2020

Christine Nakalungi

Christine Nakalungi 

By Christine Nakalungi

Last Wednesday I had a day off and had planned to spend it lazily shopping or doing something fun before a friend asked me to accompany her somewhere.

I did not hesitate because I had no engagements after all. When we arrived to where she wanted to go, she headed to the door but I stayed in the car making a phone call to my sister.

When a woman opened the door, she started shouting, “I will destroy you if you do not leave my husband.” I jumped out of the car and rushed to the door. The other woman had also started screaming, threatening to call the police. I pulled my friend away but the war of words had already started.

Neighbours had started peeping and I knew I had to find ways of dragging her away from this woman’s compound before the whole scene turned ugly. Even as I struggled to pull her away, she kept screaming and hurling threats at the other woman. “You home breaker, you will burn in hell,” she shouted.

I could not believe that she had dragged me out here without warning. “She could press charges you know.” I told her as we drove off. “I do not care; she has destroyed my marriage and I will not let her off lightly,” she said, wiping away tears.

I was dumbfounded, I mean, what do you tell someone in this situation. We drove the rest of the journey in silence. At the weekend, my phone rung. I ignored it but it kept ringing. I swore in my sleep that whoever was calling better have a good reason or I am giving them a piece of my sleepy mind.


“I am going to kill her...” the person from the other end of the line said. My sleep evaporated in micro-seconds and I found myself sitting up. I looked at the screen to see who was calling, and there she was again.
“Slow down, what are you talking about?” I asked in a tone that if she by any means goes through with her plans, the police will not charge me for conspiracy.
“She has ruined my life and my marriage; John did not come back home and I know that he is with her” she said convincingly.

“Do not do anything stupid” I tried to beg her not to throw her life away just because her husband did not return home. She was angry and she had a right to be but what she was thinking of doing would only rob her of her happiness.

Some mistresses already know that their presence will only cause drama and whereas some might be remorseful, others are stubborn and likely to cause drama so threats might just be a stir that they need to cause more drama with hopes of driving you out of that marriage. But should you just sit there and do nothing?

Most people will tell you that you have a problem or that you did something wrong to force your spouse to cheat, and perhaps when you stare in the mirror you wonder what she has that you do not. But sometimes, people just choose to cheat, and I think it is unfair for you to apologise and yet he is the one who cheated or cheats.

So, whatever you find fit to protect your marriage, I guess you should try it.