I am now in my 30s and would like to find the right woman, settle down and start a family. However, a number of women I have asked out on dates have rejected me because I am short. In most cases, even when they do not wear high heels, I still end up being shorter. Only one woman was truthful while breaking up with me while others just walk away and end all contact. What can I do? Anonymous
Stella Acola. The right person for you will never reject you for being short, tall, fat, thin, crippled or whatever way God created you. So, do not judge and, do not be desperate because you may end up with someone who will just drain you emotionally and financially.
John Matovu. For a long time I felt the same way and would judge myself before even going out on a date. I realised that I would see women rejecting me even before they did because I believed that I was not worthy of their love. Talking to a counsellor helped a lot because they made me realise all the other positive attributes that I have. I am now married to the most beautiful woman I know and we are raising a beautiful family together. You are your own stumbling block.
Justus Mugerwa. If someone rejects you for something you have no control over, then they do not deserve you at all. Focus on building your career and self-esteem at the moment. At the right time, the right person will come.
Prynce Samuel Prynce. Just believe in yourself. Height has never been used as a measure of someone’s capabilities. You need to boost your self-esteem and appreciate yourself first.
Tna Woods. This is what happens when you use your human wisdom for issues of the heart. A heart you cannot see with your physical eyes. Pray to God who sees hearts to bring you the right person.
Eunice Gift Faviours. Being short cannot be the only reason. There are many short men who have fallen in love with women who love and respect them for who they are and have built happy families together. So, sit down and think. You still have time to fix what is missing.
Fred Daniels. You are most likely looking in the wrong places. Your self-esteem and financial status plays a big role in finding a good woman not forgetting your character and values.
C’zar Engorit. Cut your cloth according to your coat. I bet you have come across women who are shorter than you. Secondly, work on branding yourself. Work hard and make sure that you are neat, dress well, are polite and speak good into your life. Your general confidence will win you the woman of your dreams.
Obba Jerry. I have met countless men who have married women taller than them. Besides, what is your definition of the right woman? Be careful, life has more important things to worry about.
Anne Alum Ngira Odoch. There is someone for everyone. At God’s time which is the best time, he will give you the right person. Just keep praying and have faith and leave the rest to God. I pray God directs you in all your endeavours of finding a soulmate.
Evelyn Kharono Lufafa, counselling psychologist
First love yourself
Your physical appearance and height are determined by factors beyond you and this is very important for you to realise. I would like to say that self-acceptance is very important here. Do not let the rejection ruin you but instead use this to strengthen your mental faculties into a better person.
What women want in a man is confidence. This is seen in how a man shows his leadership skills and the manhood tendencies in him. Have zero tolerance for self-criticism and instead have balanced thoughts such as may be this woman was not ready for a relationship.
Strengthen your self-worth by speaking positive statements about yourself such as ‘at least I am a responsible gentleman and I am sure she will miss this in me‘. You could also write down at least five positive things about yourself as an intention to bolster your self-esteem.
Shift your attention away from your height and focus on things that you are good at. Usually people are asked what they looked for in a particular person and the secret lies in the person’s behaviour.
Start by appreciating who you are that you freely joke about your own height making it easy for your girlfriend.
Everyone has a chance of finding love regardless of the physic. It is about you loving you and allowing others to love you the way you are.
Compiled by Joan Salmon