Cultivating healthy habits in a relationship

Thursday February 04 2021
By Bradford Kamuntu

One of the most rewarding outcomes of any relationship has to be the good you derive from it. Whether it ends in tears or you make it to celebrate your 50th wedding anniversary, there are always great lessons that we learn, keep and implement for the rest of our lives.

Instead of thinking back on them, or wishing you had brought out some good in each other’s lives, why not start to cultivate healthy habits that will not only build your relationship but have an effect on your individual characters.

Make it a point to connect every single day. Even on the busiest days, foster an environment where you can connect daily at the very least emotionally to share your feelings about each other or even about your various days.

This teaches you as individuals to always make the time to connect and speak to each other to vent, share words of affirmation and this would hopefully overflow into your other relationships both personal and professional. Emotional connection is the glue that holds most relationships together.

Make more time for yourself as an individual. Reignite or maintain desire in your relationship by making time for yourself and your own passions, hobbies and parts of yourself you enjoyed before the relationship.

When a long-term partner sees their beloved in their element doing something, they are reminded of that initial attraction.


Practice transparency and expressiveness. This is something that could help all aspects of your life. Whenever something bothers you, make it a point to have the uncomfortable conversations. Whatever you feel is not right in the relationship should be addressed in a calm and collected manner where the goal is to seek resolve and forge a way forward.

Understand your partner’s point of view even when you do not necessarily agree with it. Create a let’s agree to disagree environment where debate does not have to end in contention but instead makes room for an environment where different ideologies can coexist.

Do not just celebrate your similarities, but your differences too. Are you an introvert that craves nothing more than curling up in front of the TV instead of a night out? Your partner should appreciate that about you, just as you should appreciate their outgoing and extrovert nature.

This brings you out of your shell and opens you up to networking and a life you otherwise would not participate in. Some couples have the unrealistic expectation that they will enjoy all the same similarities. While this would be ideal, it is also more realistic to prepare ourselves for those differences and how best to respectfully embrace them.

Start routines as a couple. Habits that will foster personal and collective growth. Start working out together, skin care routines (and yes, gentlemen you need this too. Skin that looks like neglect is not at all cool), start reading motivational books or daily devotionals if you are both religious.

Do all that you can to ensure there is growth for both parties in each and every relationship that the habits you keep are helping strengthen your relationship and change you for the better as an individual.

Making it work. For the happiest, most harmonious relationship, experts suggest spending 70 per cent of time together, and 30 per cent apart. That gives each of you enough freedom to explore your own interests while still being rooted and invested in your relationship.