There is no proper manual for keeping a spouse

Often, you bump into a ‘senga’ as you flip through your TV or radio channels promising you steps on how to keep a spouse. It is good to listen to these people because learning never ends.

But if you have ever been single for five or more years, you will testify that not all they say works for everybody. There is no one solution that works for all.

So, what should you do?

Not to drive you further into the lake of confusion you are already in, I believe in being you and letting somethings work out on their own. If you do what your neighbour did, it might never work out for you because we all have a different path of life. This is not a competition of whose marriage works better, the goal is to have a happy marriage and to keep it that way.

“But you can never say yes easily to a man’s proposal?” They used to tell us.

Lately, a man has three people on his list, whoever says yes first gets his ring. You would say that maybe that one was not meant for you but some people take no as a no; their ego has regularly stood in their way that they would rather settle for less than beg for love.

Yes, some men do not want to beg.

You might just lose a good man just because you were playing hard to get.

I have witnessed marriages that started with a ‘no’ but ended up in a yes. There have also been those where the woman said no and the man moved on. Yes, easy come might mean easy go but I have also seen a couple who fell in love at first sight and tied the knot.

Years later, they are still going strong. No one can surely tell you how you will meet your Prince Charming unless you are the kind who believes in psychics, but I do not.

Love comes to us all but sometimes we turn it away. Do not believe it or assume that a better phase of love is coming. Taking long to accept a man’s proposal is not a guarantee that he will never breakup up with you. Human beings are an unpredictable specie. How about you follow your heart and see where it takes you, if that does not work out, cry a little and move on. Life is a journey where love is a spice. Do not give up life just because you could not find anyone to marry you.

Times have changed, what worked for my grandparents might not work for me but if it worked for her, there is also a possibility that it could work for me. Our ancestors used to think that kneeling down for him and calling him kingly names would make him monogamous. We know how that ended.

Follow your heart and keep an open mind when it comes to love. When you get a chance to love, love with all your might and maybe it will yield better results. There is no beginner’s guide to keeping a spouse, you just take it one step at a time.