Trust, communication will keep a long-distance relationship going

Thursday April 22 2021
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Christine Nakalungi

By Christine Nakalungi

There are two key ingredients to the success of long distance relationships. If you lose any of them, the relationship cannot survive. Long distance relationships might seem interesting with the, “I miss you” calls in the beginning but if you are the kind that ‘catches’ feelings easily and likes drama, then this kind of relationship is not for you.

It is already hard to stay away from someone you love, imagine not being able to get that hug when you have had a bad day or wakeup to breakfast in bed. When the loneliness kicks in, you do not have any other option but hang onto the old memories and thankfully, use technology to talk or even video chat.

Long distance relationships do not come with the luxury of blocking communication. Yes, even if you have a misunderstanding, you must be brave and put your feelings aside because one day of no communication will drive the relationship five steps backward.

Do not underestimate the power of the physical bond when it comes to a relationship. Sometimes a touch or hug takes away all the doubt you have for someone. And its absence brings nothing but hurtache.

Job did not know what he signed up for when he decided to go for studies in London. His three-year relationship took a dramatic turn three months into his course. She stopped answering his calls. She always did that whenever they had a misunderstanding, but Job showed up in person to win her back. This time, it was not an option. Forget the air ticket, he did not have time to cancel his classes to fly back and win over his girl but the pandemic did not help. She spent a week without any communication as Job contacted anyone who could talk to her to no avail.

After a week, Job was tired of playing games. He buried his loneliness into his books. He made sure he was occupied most of the time to subdue the thoughts that would make him sad and angry. When he stopped chasing, the girlfriend then added fuel to the already burning furnace. “May be he is now cheating,” she said.

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She started blackmailing the colleagues who had refused to pass on the unfounded message. Until one of his friends decided to return the favour, “what do you want him to do? Should he spend all his upkeep to come see you? Or do you want him to cancel his scholarship to come just to prove to you that he still loves you?” he asked.

As she cried, he added: “I suggest you get used to the idea of him being away or you find someone else.” Job finally learnt of this conversation and he was furious with his friend but agreed with him. He even contemplated quitting the relationship.

It would not have been his option but every time you hold someone captive, they are likely going to go with the easiest option they can find and for long distance, the breakup sounds easier than the drama. If you can keep the communication flowing, distance cannot stand between you. So many relationships have survived the distance and you too can if you are willing to put in the work.

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