Your ex moving on should act as inspiration

Thursday February 25 2021
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Christine Nakalungi

By Christine Nakalungi

The pain of a breakup comes in phases, none of which is easier than the other, but this depends entirely on the victim. From the time you realise that it is over, it starts to hurt. Then comes the sleepless nights and daydreaming becomes part of your daily schedule.

But deep down you might be tempted to think that maybe, just maybe your relationship will resume. This string of hope usually brings relief to the hurting soul. As a matter of fact, some people find makeup romance the best part of mending a relationship.

As the days go on, those who never reconcile embrace the truth and start to forge a way to move on. Most people prefer moving on before the ex does because if your ex moves on before you, you realise that maybe you were not ready to witness the fact that it is over.

But as you go through this other phase of recovering, it is important to turn that pain into inspiration. Unfortunately, some people choose this time to plot against the new catch and maybe fight their way back into a relationship. However, sometimes we just have to believe it is over and nothing you do will change that.

Morris was hopeful that she would change her mind and forgive him. More than a year later, he was still hopeful until he decided to cyber stalk her on social media. He now regrets this move, but is grateful for the lesson learnt.

Poor guy felt as though she had said the, “it is over” statement all over again. All the feelings he thought he had overcome arose again. The bitterness, the anger, the regret, and the frustration he had felt a year ago was still so fresh. So, he grieved again but this time he had no one to tell, nobody pitied him because it had been a year and come on, by now, everyone believed that he should have moved on.

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But during this time of hurt and soul searching, his friend, who also secretly admired him decided to speak up. “Listen, why are you still crying over her? I was your shoulder last time, but I refuse to be taken for a fool. Are you planning on waiting for her forever or you are going to stop being a cry baby and realise that there are still other women willing to give you a chance?

 I thought I was giving you time to sober up from her charm but I just realised that you are stuck,” she said before walking away. He called a few mutual friends to tell them how offended he was by her words. They just added salt to the wound. “That girl likes you, but you are so hurt to even realise that. ”

Morris was hearing this for the first time, but all his friends thought he had taken a step to move on.

As he thought about it, he realised that his friend Sylvia had been the best thing that had happened to him ever since his breakup. And her argument had felt more like a couple fighting than a friend arguing. So, he decided to give ‘moving on’ a try.

He called Sylvia and took a brave step of asking her out. He now believed that if his ex could move on, he too could.

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