Our interpretion of sexual harassment

Benjie
At first I thought the question was about how and if men get sexually harassed but....I don’t think that men consciously know that they have crossed a line and this is mainly because the way we are brought up is to have no boundaries and if they exist, to disregard them.
As such, men feel they can have their way. So they will say, do or touch without respect for women or for their protestations. I think men need to learn and be conscious of what is appropriate to say or do around a woman, as a show of respect to her because very few ever have a clue.

Eugene Mugisha
I don’t think I also fully understand what sexual harassment means. I used to think it referred to unwanted attention that is also overly sexual, until I realised that even making sexist comments can be interpreted as sexual harassment.
After that, I watch my step, and just try to avoid anything that might be interpreted as sexual or sexist. So if you ask me, sexual harassment can mean anything from looking at a girl lewdly to actually grabbing her bottom as she passes by, to falling just short of sexual assault.
Ivan Okuda
It is indecent behaviour as seen and judged by the one on the receiving end. To some women a man walking to their desk in office, holding them tight and pecking their dimpled cheeks is okay if she knows and is the type who doesn’t mind flirting and getting naughty or is innocently friendly by nature and means well in these moments of cheekiness. To others it is sexual harassment. How dare he touch me like he is my husband?
So, every case is then treated on its own merits and every man ought to know what makes one woman happy and another uncomfortable. We just have to understand different people. To some a boss asking for some isn’t harassment for she looks at him as any other man and isn’t persuaded he is using his office to get her laid.
To another woman that is a police case. So really everyone has their context, the test of a gentleman is then, getting past and through these layers of human likes and dislikes.

Andrew Wallace
The boundaries around sexual harassment to women are very blurred. This is probably why many men (even women) are awfully unsure what the limits are. The general perception however, especially in the corporate world is that- once a female colleague reports sexual harassment, whoever is suspected to have committed this offense is finished! Chances of getting acquitted are next to none!
Therefore many men, especially bosses who work in organisations where these laws are strictly followed, have decided to either one. Totally steer clear from the female colleagues at work or two.
Gotten mired into this passive stage of gender inclusion, never daring to become active watchdogs for respect and inclusion or just look the other way when their male colleagues ‘misbehave’…which in a way is a failure of both moral imagination and courage.

The guys

Ivan Okuda: 21, at University.
Benjie: 27, single
Eugene Mugisha: 29, the dating guru.
Andrew Wallace: 30, recently married.