Satire: Why are we too patient with these Arts teachers?

Arts teachers in Uganda are still on strike over salary enhancement. 

What you need to know:

  • Their continued disdain for the Arts is the closest they ever come to admit that they have been a big burden to this country.

I was reading somewhere that Arts teachers who laid down their chalk and left learners to play ‘kwepena’ in school compound were traitors because they earned full salary during Covid-induced lockdown when they were at home star-gazing.

And then I leafed somewhere else and someone was asking, “did the Arts teachers order the lockdown?”

Like seriously, has there been a more brazen treasonous utterance than this? How can you ask if the Arts teachers called for the lockdown as if you do not know that if they were all Science teachers, we wouldn’t have needed the lockdown because they would have found the solution to the pandemic?

As Scientists were busy running their hair strands dry and growing bald in search of Covid medicine, these Arts traitors were there just to convince their neighbours’ children that dreamt up stuff such as the burning bush and Samson’s hair were real. 

In a more serious government that wants to sustain its hard-earned middle income economy, such jokers would be paraded naked and forced to swim in sand.

But here we’ve been inviting them to one meeting after another. They come, take the African tea they had never taken in their life and sit in cosy leather seats from one consultation meeting after another. They are enjoying it.

How do you expect chaps who had only been sitting on metallic benches or greased wooden chairs to call off the strike when they know it is the only way they will ever feel the cool breeze of air con? 

There is a man in Makerere who has been shouting for attention with suspensions and expulsions of anyone who looks left when he is looking right. Government should return to learning from Makerere because this is the apex of education in this country. 

If this guy in Makerere had been deployed on Unatu for just five minutes, this strike nonsense would long have been a thing of newspaper columnists to pick on.

The other day, one of the striking teachers even had the audacity to claim that most of the leaders in the country studied Arts. Of course, that is also why they understand that Arts is a load of rubbish. Their continued disdain for the Arts is the closest they ever come to admit that they have been a big burden to this country.

However, it is thanks to their love for the country that they do not want to see many more of their ilk. 

They want to leave the country in good hands and that’s something we all must support. 

Imagine how wasted we are. In the world of science we are trying to forge, if you leaked information about the Speaker’s and Deputy Speaker’s cars, the Scientist who lands on it will think of designing a better car. But give that to an Arts chap!

Yes, you guessed right – they go with it on Twitter. And then this riles their equally Arts-headed chaps in Parliament, who then begin to threaten their lives. That’s all that happens in the Arts – confusion, lots of confusion.

We need to stop the nonsense of these Arts teachers. I mean, let’s stop reading here because I’m art inside out myself. And that’s why I am sane. The other day my buddy who studied Agriculture was telling me of how he is soon inventing a machine that stops sleeping persons from farting.
We need arts to keep scientists sane.

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