Carnelian Mary Ndagire who died at Kiruddu Hospital on February 5, 2025. PHOTO/VICENT LUSAMBYA
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17-year-old girl’s protest against single-sex school ends in death
What you need to know:
- The 17-year-old had reportedly preferred a mixed-day school so as to maintain a relationship with her 21-year-old boyfriend.
Last Wednesday, Carnelian Mary Ndagire, a 17-year-old Senior Three student, succumbed to severe burns at Kiruddu Hospital, which she had sustained after setting herself ablaze in a desperate protest against going back to a single-sex boarding school.
According to sources close to the family, the teenager, who lived with her grandparents, Cissy and Sam Kiwanuka, in Kisowera-Nama, Mukono District, had expressed a strong preference for attending a mixed day school. This, she believed, would enable her to pursue her studies while maintaining a relationship with her 21-year-old boyfriend, a motorcycle mechanic employed at Kisowera Trading Centre.
Mr Karim Kiggundu, a witness, told Daily Monitor that as they rushed to rescue the deceased teenager, she could be heard repeatedly expressing her desire to attend a mixed-day school.
"As we attempted to rescue her, Carnelian repeatedly screamed, 'I want to go to my boyfriend, I don’t want to return to Mpoma, I prefer attending a day school in Kisowera,’ despite her parents having already paid the school fees,” Mr Kiggundu recounted.
Furthermore, in a recorded phone video obtained by Daily Monitor, Ndagire can be heard, while lying on her sickbed, pleading to be allowed to maintain contact with her boyfriend.
“I’m here before you, and I know you love me dearly. However, my boyfriend is suffering on the other side. Please, I beg of you, let this come to an end so that we can all be safe and sound,” she said.
A nurse at Kisowera Medical Clinic, where the deceased was initially taken for first aid, revealed that the teenager had attempted to flee the facility to go to her boyfriend's workplace, about 100 metres away.
"She attempted to escape and run to her boyfriend but was restrained by some revellers and brought back to our clinic. We even tried to sedate her before her parents could transfer her to a larger medical facility,” said a nurse, who wished to remain anonymous.
The teenager's alleged boyfriend, identified only as Bashir, fled the village shortly after hearing the news that his girlfriend had set herself on fire.
According to Mr Abbey Bagenda Bitwalo, the chairperson of Kisowera LC1, the guardians attempted to report the incident to his office, but he advised them to prioritise taking the patient to the hospital first.
“When they found my secretary, they got me on the phone, and I advised them that if the child was severely burnt, waiting at the office for me to arrive would be of no use. I instructed them to take the child to the hospital immediately. Unfortunately, she didn’t survive,” he said.
Meanwhile, Ms Oliver Kunihira, the officer-in-charge (OC) of Nama Police Post, revealed that the incident was not reported to them, hence not currently under investigation.
“It was only after the child’s death when the family was requested to obtain a post-mortem form that they inadvertently came to our office. I directed them to the main police station in Mukono, where such forms are typically available. That’s how I became aware of the case,” the OC explained.
Ms Stella Namukasa, an aunt of the deceased, stated that as parents, they had persuaded Ndagire to continue attending the single-sex school, and to their surprise, she had initially agreed.
"We had managed to convince her, pointing out that we had already paid her school fees at the single-sex school she had been attending. She seemed to have accepted our explanation, but unfortunately, on the day she was supposed to return to school, Ndagire bought petrol and set herself on fire while her grandmother had taken her siblings to a nearby school,” said Ms Namukasa.
The incident has sparked widespread grief and shock in the community, prompting calls for greater support and understanding for students struggling with similar issues.
Mr Christopher Bwire, the head teacher of Mpoma Girls School, where the late Ndagire was a student, remembered her as a lively, friendly, and academically ambitious child.
"I recall that last term, she had undergone surgery for an abdominal issue but endeavoured to attend school before she had fully recovered. I am struggling to comprehend what might have driven her to take such a drastic step,” he said.
Experts: Poverty escalating death by suicide
Reagan Francis Kimbugwe, a friend of the deceased, said Ndagire's decision to end her life came as a shock.
"I recall helping her carry her school supplies from shops just a day before, and she seemed fine, happy, and optimistic about returning to school. She didn't appear overwhelmed in any way. I wish she had opened up,” he said, fighting back tears.
Appeal
Ms Ephrance Najjuma, a senior woman in the village, urged parents to foster close relationships with their children.
“We need to do more to listen to our children and support them in their struggles. The traditional disciplinary approach of being harsh and rude is no longer effective for children of this generation. This tragedy serves as a wakeup call for all of us,” said Ms Najjuma.
Mr Emmanuel Gitta, a counselor and head of public relations at the Uganda Counseling Association, advised that children, especially teenagers, should cultivate strong support systems among their friends and family. This would enable them to process their emotions in a healthy manner, rather than dealing with them in isolation and potentially resorting to destructive solutions.
Mr Bwiire emphasised that mental health is not only for students but also for staff, parents, and other caregivers. He highlighted the school's efforts to ensure that every learner is mentally well.
"We've made deliberate efforts to support our learners' mental health through a programme called foster parenting. Each child is assigned a parent figure within the institution to address these issues. I believe that if Ndagire had opened up to her foster parents, this situation might have been prevented," he said.
He urged parents to take deliberate steps to promote their children's mental health. This includes actively listening to them and providing help when needed.
“If you're unable to provide the necessary help, seek guidance from competent and qualified professionals."
Mr Gitta further emphasised the importance of promoting healthy relationships among adolescent learners, noting that the more parents avoid having open and honest conversations about these issues, the more the country will struggle with unhealthy minds among adolescents.
"For instance, if Ndagire's boyfriend had good intentions, he could have encouraged her to attend school and reassured her that he would be waiting for her at home. However, in toxic relationships, boyfriends may use manipulative language, saying things like, 'If you leave, who will be left for me?' Such negative comments can trigger feelings of desperation in the girl, leading her to make drastic decisions," he said.
Mr Bagenda cautioned teenagers to listen carefully and seek advice from elders when they feel overwhelmed and desperate, rather than resorting to destructive decisions.
Background
Growing Trend
The National Population and Housing Census 2024 report reveals that Uganda experienced 272,271 suicidal thoughts and attempts over the past decade, with children being the most affected demographic.
According to the report:
- Children aged 10 to 14 recorded the highest number of cases (39,656 incidents).
- Adolescents aged 15 to 19 followed with 36,615 cases.
- Young adults aged 20 to 24 recorded 34,697 cases.
