Writer: Robert Kigongo. PHOTO/FILE
Red dresses and black tuxedoes, chocolate and red roses littered the streets of many African cities on Friday as the elite celebrated the day of love.
Listening to Luther Vandross’ So Amazing, I believed we fall in love forever until Kiana Shelton, a prominent therapist in his interview with CNN Health, posed a question, “Should we break up before or after Valentine’s Day?”
This question woke my consciousness from the ecstasy of Valentine’s Day to think about the rate of divorce happening around the world today.
My alumnus and neighbour, Joseph (not real name) met Mary (also not real name) while at university on Valentine’s Day, sparking a romance and countless date nights that ended up with the couple walking down the aisle. Shockingly, four years later the two could not stand each other anymore.
While there are so many issues that contribute to divorce such as infidelity, low sex drive, poor communication, infertility, illness, and political ideologies, in the case of Joseph and Mary it was poverty.
Joseph was terminated from work when the Covid-19 pandemic hit the world. He tried retail business but he was not successful, and that is when poverty hit him.
His wife lost patience with a husband who could not take care of his family. As a confidant and neighbour, I witnessed a series of fights between the two.
Mary had to look for means of survival to keep the family afloat, which sadly led to infidelity. Joseph couldn’t stand it, which sadly led to their divorce.
According to Deep Dive into Divorce and Separation in Uganda 2020, published on www.hiil.org, about seven percent of Ugandans have gone through divorce or separation in the past four years. According to media reports, the number of divorce cases filed in the Family Division of the High Court doubled from 215 in 2023 to more than 500 last year.
Given the increasing number of single parents in our societies today, divorce and separation are breaking up the belief and faith in the traditional family as the first unit of society. This sometimes leads children into drug and substance abuse, moral decay, and early marriages.
The earlier we address underlying causes of divorce in our societies such as poverty, adultery, alcoholism and domestic violence, the better.
The effects of divorce go beyond the separation of a couple, but break up families, leading to destitution, prostitution, child labour and street children, chronic alcoholism, and depression thus increasing mental health cases, illnesses, suicides, and early death.
I used to assume that divorce matters are personal issues of married partners, but these end up spilling into the larger society, work environment, and national planning, shattering the dreams of many in the process.
Divorce causes a burden to governments with emergency of issues such as street children, loss of productivity among employees, court case backlog, and financial strain. Therefore, the government must come up with strong policies and family reconciliation structures at all levels.
The government should speed up the processing of the Marriage and Divorce Bill and tailor it to a version that is agreeable to the majority of the public and stakeholders.
It is also high time that employers prioritise the psycho-social welfare of the employees by allowing them a well-balanced work-life relationship.
Faith-based organisation’s intervention is very critical to minimising divorce cases, while cultural institutions can equally play a role in saving families from the scourge of divorce.
Saving the family as the first unit of government starts with addressing the underlying factors causing divorce and separation.
The writer, Robert Kigongo, is a sustainable development analyst.
