
Esther Kawuga narrates her ordeal. Right, Kawuga shows off her injured leg during the interview.
A woman earning more than her spouse is nothing new. With women’s emancipation, many families are grateful for the contribution of female breadwinners to household income and family development.
However, some partners feel threatened by the shift in power dynamics. In a paper, Female breadwinning and domestic abuse: evidence from Australia, published in the Journal of Population Economics in September 2023, the effect of women out-earning their male partners increases their level of risk for violence.
In other words, as a woman’s economic power increases, her bargaining power also increases. However, when her income exceeds that of her partner, this significantly heightens the incidence of domestic violence and emotional abuse against her.
Esther Kawuga owns a makeshift restaurant in Tirinyi Town Council. For the last 14 years, the restaurant has been her main source of income. Such has been the windfall that she singlehandedly bought land and built the family home, another house, and rentals.

Susan Mugoya, District councilor for Tirinyi Sub-county
Her husband roasts and sells chicken for a living. Kawuga, a mother of six, is the second wife. The first wife has eight children. Kawuga has been married to her husband for 14 years, eight of which, have been marred by relentless abuse.
“One day, eight years ago, I returned home from work and found him beating the children, accusing them of not bathing in time. I talked to him, requesting him to tone down on the violence. In response, he turned to me and began hitting me on the head until I bled,” she says.
That is when the war in their home began. The violence follows a pattern. Kawuga’s husband first canes the children and then progresses to battering his wife.
“When the beating is too much, I ran away from home. I sleep at a neighbour’s home or the home of the LCI chairperson for a day or two days. But I always return. He has promised to kill me if I do not leave our home and return to my parents,” the distraught woman says.
Her husband has long abandoned his role as the family provider and has dared her to take him to court. He also disowned their children, the eldest of whom is 18. For the whole of last year, he did not pay a penny in school fees.
Daily Monitor found a pregnant Kawuga at the police station, where for the first time, she found the courage to drag her husband, at the instigation of her father. She cries as she narrates the latest round of abuse.
He beat her so savagely that she was hospitalised. Upon returning home, she was locked out, left to fend for herself in the dark of the night.
“He insists I should leave our home, but I built this home. It was my money that built all the property we have. All he does is collect money from the tenants, which I never see. I have come to the police station so that he can tell me why he beats me,” she says.
Kawuga’s husband has only one condition. If she wants to continue living in his home, she has to stop working. The income from her restaurant is the only one sustaining the family. When his first wife abandoned the marriage, Kawuga was forced to provide for her stepchildren.
“For nine years, about 18 people were living under one roof. Surprisingly, he did not provide for us. I had to take money out of my restaurant to meet the needs of all the children. When he started battering me, he took my co-wife’s children to the village. He provides for them,” she says.
Victims clinging to abusers
Susan Mugoya, the district councilor for Tirinyi sub-county, has counseled Kawuga for several years. Mugoya always encouraged her to remain in the marriage.
“When she met that man, he was poor. She began a business and used the profits to build houses that should have earned them more income. Instead, the violence against her is growing. The problem is that in our Bugwere culture when most men get money, they begin mistreating their wives,” she says.
Mugoya adds that she always advised Kawuga to approach her husband and ask why he beats her. And if he had any issues with her character, she should change it. She says while a few years ago, the men who abused their wives would only beat them, nowadays, they want to kill them.
“Previously, the couple would fight but then, they would reconcile and even have more children. But now, men are so angry at life and are taking it out on their wives. I advise men to seek advice from their peers when their wives annoy them, instead of acting impulsively. You cannot beat your wife the same way you would beat a snake,” she says.
The councilor is worried that with the continued beating, Kawuga might miscarry the child she is carrying. When we ask Kawuga why she does not, for the sake of her life and that of the child she is carrying, leave the home.
“I cannot leave because my children belong to this home. What if he hurts them when I am away? Four of my children are below eight years and they cannot cook for themselves. Why should I leave my home? Let him go to his father’s home and leave us alone,” she says.

Esther Kawuga narrates her ordeal. Right, Kawuga shows off her injured leg during the interview
Taking the children to her father’s home is also out of the question, although he has persistently urged her to leave, including sending bodabodas to transport her. Besides, Kawuga says she has taken out loans to boost her business and if she returned to her parent’s home, she would be defaulting on the loans.
Samuel Musiko, the resident district commissioner of Kabuki district says the rise in domestic violence in the district stems from the fact that many men do not want to work.
“You will find middle-aged men in the trading centre, playing card games for money. Some begin playing at 8 am and only leave the table at 9 am. The money he wins at the cards is barely enough to feed his family. That is why in most homes, women are the breadwinners,” he explains.
He calls on youths and adults to take advantage of the loans available in the Parish Development Model, a government strategy to improve the quality of life and incomes of its citizens, to set up development projects.
“If they sat down to plan with their wives, poverty would be history in this area. Unfortunately, due to the men’s behaviour, a decision was taken to give the loans to women, who are more trustworthy than their spouses. We are sensitizing the youth because domestic violence is fueled by lack of money,” he says.
Societal norms
Moses Mweraguzo, the district probation officer, reports that in the past six months, Kibuku registered 30 cases of domestic violence, 15 of which are already in court. However, many such cases go unreported.
“Women work tirelessly to provide for their families, and when the harvest season arrives, men want to take everything. In our culture, women are not entitled to own land. When a woman purchases land, her husband will try to seize it, that the money she used to buy the land was earned while she was living in his home,” he says.

Samuel Musiko, Kabuki District RDC
Such cultures sustain the cycle of suffering that leaves women and children as collateral damage. Mweraguzo adds that in 2021, in one of such cases, a man poured hot water on his wife’s face.
“My office took the case to court but because we were under a Covid-19 induced lockdown, the case was delayed, and the man fled. Later, he approached his wife’s parents and apologised for his action. The family reached out to the court to settle the matter privately, and the couple reconciled,” he says.
However, Ramathan Nima, the chairperson of Tirinyi sub-county, argues that the problem also stems from a lack of support for men. He states that while many organisations focus solely on women, none advocate for men's rights.
“Men face various challenges in life but have nowhere to turn to for help. They bottle up their feelings and later take it out on their women. We need organisations that advocate for men's rights and educate them on how to handle conflicts to prevent violence,” he says.
Badru Kiirya, the First Deputy Prime Minister of the Bugwere Cultural Institution, says that as a measure to stem the tide of domestic violence, the Institution has abolished the practice of men paying dowry.
“When a man pays dowry, his wife becomes his property. If the woman leaves the marriage, her family is expected to refund the dowry, forcing many women to endure abuse because they lack the means to repay it,” he says.
Furthermore, the Institution is enacting a cultural policy to prevent the inheritance of land. Instead, land will remain family property so that women cannot inherit it.
“Currently, women can inherit land from their fathers. This has empowered them. On the other hand, it has led to strong resistance from men,” Kiirya says.
Kawuga’s story is a painful reminder that domestic violence is not just a private issue—it is a societal crisis. The silence and inaction surrounding such cases only embolden perpetrators while trapping victims in a web of fear and helplessness.