Financial boundaries for relatives
A woman gestures that she is not able to assist financially. When it comes to financial leaks, it is your responsibility to keep in check because it is not a guarantee that you will get your money back. SHUTTERSTOCK PHOTO
What you need to know:
- In most cases, the more financially stable you are the more your relatives will refer to you as the ‘family bank.’ But this can be at the expense of your future plans if you don’t set limits, Annet Katusiime writes.
It is a great relief for someone to step in your shoes with financial assistance when things are not going on well. However, most people never consider the sacrifice one makes to make that happen.
Most times once you help someone financially it becomes a routine for them to rely on you for that help and when it doesn’t come through the way they expect it, relationships could go sour with others feeling it is an entitlement. Most people have challenges dealing with helping relatives in regard to issues of managing their personal finances. This is one of the financial pressures that have left people in debt and unstable incomes. Below are a few tips on how to handle relatives while staying financially fit.
Plan your expenses
If you have people you are obliged to help, set aside some money to help them. I admire the Jewish way of savings where by before their incomes, they put a side different jars with a percentage allocation 10 per cent goes on tithe, 10 per cent savings, 20 per cent on investment, 10 per cent on giving and 50 per cent on spending. Therefore, you should have a budget for your spending plan in order to live within your means.
Learn to say “No”
Amidst planning, if you realise you are on a tight budget and you can only make ends meet for your immediate family, a “No” will save you a lot of trouble. It does not make sense to borrow to help someone. Putting your financial position at stake is one thing you should avoid. I know how hard it is to say ‘No’ considering our cultural norms of being too nice not to spoil relationships. But when it comes to financial leaks, it is your responsibility to keep in check because it is not a guarantee that you will get your money back.
Help them from where they are
If you must help a relative, it is cost effective and emotionally healthy to help them from where they are. Avoid accommodating every relative in your home. For example, if you need to help one go to school, it is very affordable to pay fees and offer other requirements if they stayed in the village than you bringing them to your house especially if you are in a town setting.
Many families have broken up because of bringing in people to stay in the name of helping because most come with different agendas beyond your imagination.
Don’t stress
You don’t have to stress yourself over other people’s needs before you satisfy your own. It is also important to plan for eventualities no matter the circle of friends or people surrounding you because everyone is busy making their lives better.
So, plan beyond what you see today and don’t be deceived by the many people that surround you while you are alive. Your family may suffer if you waste resources.
“Be Money wiser.”
You are not a saviour
My late dad helped many people financially. But on his sick bed, we had to lease some property to cater for his medical expenses abroad because it was quite expensive besides his time back for recovery was also another heart breaking moment that the family had to endure. Unfortunately, he passed on. We had siblings going to school in low levels of education but to my surprise, the people who used to flood our home for parties and happy moments vanished and the people he helped financially were nowhere to be seen.
Ms Annet Katusiime is a financial literacy trainer and consultant at Be Money Wiser co. Ltd
