What is in a marital name?

What better way to answer this than by summoning the age old wisdom of literary giant William Shakespeare. “What’s in a name? That which we call a rose, by any other name would smell as sweet,” Juliet told Romeo in the play Romeo and Juliet.

Shakespeare made everything as easy as that. In essence that whether she takes up his name or not does not matter, a name is only accorded to us and we lose nothing fundamental when we are accorded it or not. But that is as far as a liberal outlook to life can get. Some men will divorce over their name not being used but

Jamie
It should not be such an issue since legally, it is not a must for a woman to take her husband’s name. It matters though when you look at it from the angle of the reason for marriage. Why does a woman get married to a man? The traditional reason also includes the fact that the woman will have to depend on her man for protection, affirmation and provision. In other words, the woman has to acknowledge the man’s leading role in her life. Taking his name is not therefore meant to be by force; it is by choice.

Eugene Mugisha
Yes, I think it does matter. The whole institution of marriage is built around the sentence ‘and two shall become one’. Meaning, they practically (forgive the pun) and literally become one person, and what better way to symbolise oneness than by sharing a name. Now whether the man takes the woman’s name or vice versa is a matter of social conditioning, we have taught ourselves that it is better for the woman to take the man’s name, since the woman too accepts that the man is the head of the family. It is very fulfilling to have a woman take on your name, but it is not a deal breaker. She is still my wife with or without my name, no?

Benjie
I think I’d love it if my wife took my name. That’s really part of the point of marriage. So, in a way it matters because it is about oneness and possessiveness.
Of course, there’s the issue of if she has already built a brand around her name but ultimately, I think it is up to her, to want to take your name. That is different from you wanting her to.

Andrew Wallace
In my opinion, a surname change shouldn’t be an expectation. I like to think of it as a gift. When a wife offers to take on her man’s name, It’s one of the greatest gifts she can ever give him. Plus, I think there is everything to gain from having a common family name, but all couple is different.

That said, no man should pressure his wife into changing her identity, especially if he is not willing to reciprocate. Whatever she decides to do with her name is her own business, really! If she does, then, lucky for you, if she doesn’t, well…wait until the kids come, maybe then you can name them after you. Life has to move on.

I always feel that the bond is what is important in any marriage, taking on his name is just a bonus. There has never been a correlation between having a husband’s last name and commitment. Get your mind right!