A marriage proposal was unnecessary

When and where did you meet?
Irene: We met at campus [university]. That particular day, my roommate invited me to join her for a medical trip in Ishaka, which I did. On the bus, John Paul kept staring at me and he came to our seat, to say hello. So the entire trip he kept coming by. I think he liked me. A couple of months later, he called me again and invited me for coffee. We kicked it off then, although he later wrote me a love letter asking me to be his girlfriend. By that time, I had already fallen for him so it was a definite yes.
John Paul: We met in 2008 at Makerere University.

At what age did you get married?
Irene: I was 25 years old.
John Paul: 29.

Did he propose to you?
Irene: Proposal? No!

What was it like?
Irene: It is something we talked about casually, and started planning for marriage. He said, “Irene I want to marry you. We should get married.”

How did you react?
Irene: I just said yes, I will marry you because we had gotten so comfortable with each other.

What did you like most about each other ?
Irene: JP is free-spirited, so I was attracted to his fun-loving nature. Despite his busy schedule as a doctor, he made time for me and proudly introduced me to his friends and relatives. This made me feel good.
John Paul: Mutual respect, ability to hold an intelligent conversation, and being a Gayaza old girl.

What were the most expensive items at your wedding?
Irene: The decorations, which cost us Shs3m, cake Shs2.5m and video coverage at Shs3.2m.
John Paul; Wedding attire cost Shs3.2m.

Did you go for premarital counselling and who was in charge?
Irene: Yes, Fr Larry Kanyike and Fr Josephat Ddungu.
John Paul: It is a church wedding prerequisite.

What lessons did you learn from it?
Irene: Communication and trust is the foundation of marriage. Every marriage is unique so do not go copying how people’s marriages are and paste it in your own marriage.
John Paul: Encourage one another especially when one is feeling low. We should see the beauty in using “tag” names and not our real names as we communicate.

What was your budget and how did you raise the funds?
John Paul: Shs35m. We started saving earlier in the year, actually opened a joint account for the wedding. We also received enormous contributions from friends and family.

What was going through your mind during your wedding?
Irene: I was a bit nervous, especially while walking down the aisle, because I thought to myself; this is it for better for worse.
However, I calmed down and enjoyed the entire church ceremony. I was happy he chose to marry me.
John Paul: Having hit yet another milestone in life with someone I love, trust and cherish.

What did you like the most?
Irene: When my husband took off my veil, his facial expression was wowing and he told me I looked very beautiful. I felt like a queen at that moment.
John Paul: Entering the church.

Were you disappointed in any way?
Irene: I was only disappointed at the salon because they worked on me in a rush because one of the other brides claimed her church service was earlier than mine. I discovered it was two hours later.
John Paul: No.

How was your wedding eve?
Irene: I was at the salon doing my nails and plaiting my hair. I also had a talk with my mum and Senga plus a yummy meal.
John Paul: I was doing final touches at the reception venue and headed to my parents’ home. I was told that I had to spend that night at my parents’.

Where did you go for honeymoon and what did you enjoy the most while there?
Irene: Johannesburg-South Africa. It was summer, so we went out and had fun activities, shopping, spent a day in the gold reef city, did quite a lot of partying and visited some historical apartheid sites.

What is your advice to those planning to get married?
Irene: Study your fiancé and be sure he agrees on some principles, home affairs, number of children and the like.
John Paul: It is a wonderful institution! And I will add a disclaimer to that; you must choose your partner wisely. Marry someone you easily get along with, even in the most annoying moments.

How did you prepare for the anniversary?
Irene: We invited close friends and family to our new home to celebrate with us the five years.
John Paul: We drew a list of the friends we wanted to come and agreed on what to feed them.
We also had to make sure we put a coat of paint on the outside of our house. The anniversary made us do this a couple of months earlier than we had planned for.

Why celebrate a five-year anniversary and not wait for 10years?
Irene: Five years for us is a big milestone; we have seen couples failing to make it through even the first year. But we wanted to thank God for His grace. But we look forward to 10 years, 20 years plus other celebrations.
John Paul: We had achieved so much as a couple. Things we did not have or thought would take longer for us to get. We felt the good Lord had been good to us in the five years.

How can one cut wedding costs?
Irene: Start saving early as a couple, don’t overly rely on friends and relatives, anything can happen. Make bookings early to get good discounts, especially with the fluctuating prices you can never know what will happen in the future.
John Paul: Keep your invitation list small. You’ll have cut on feeding costs, sitting capacity, number of overhead covers (tents or so), plus venue.

Titbits
Date: December 31, 2011
Groom: John Paul Kiyaga
Bride: Irene P. Nabwire
Church: St Augustine Chapel ,Makerere
Officiant: Fr Joseph Ddungu
Reception:Spring Gardens Munyonyo
Budget: Shs 35m
Honeymoon: Johannesburg, SA