I fasted for a husband

One morning, I was looking for every reason in the world to delay getting out of bed. My eye fell on an old newspaper on the floor with a story titled I fasted for a husband.
I snatched it up, burrowed into bed and became engrossed in the story of a girl who wanted a husband more than anything in the world.
She got a piece of paper and listed all the traits of the husband she wanted God to send her. He must be white, with a straight nose, tall, handsome...
You see? This is why I’m against young girls reading Mills & Boon romances. A straight nose? White? All she missed out was blond hair and blue eyes. And so she started to earnestly fast. She fasted for long, nga she fasted.

Whaddya know? Miracles abounded. This half-Italian guy (well, almost white at least) loved the way she danced in church (and he’s a Christian too. My, my). Our Cinderella is a friend to his sister and one day is too unwell to leave her house, so she ‘wants’ to stay the night. Unfortunately, her friend is not home and she’s alone with the half-Italian brother.
She was a shy girl apparently. She wrote him a note asking if she could stay the night. He wrote her a note back saying yes, she could. Then he wrote her another note asking why she has so much sadness in her face, and he would do anything to take away her pain and carry her burdens on his shoulders.
Brother, please. You’re taking this saviour complex thing too far.

So she finally got her knight in shining armour who ‘is not very well off but God will provide’. I put down the newspaper, got out of bed and was silent for about three seconds.
Then I had enjoyed the longest best laugh I have had in over a week. It was a snicker, then it became a giggle then I was literally falling back on the bed and rolling in laughter. If I could meet this girl, I’d ask her only one question.
My dear child, why didn’t you just take a shortcut and fast for wealth?