Church should encourage cohabiting couples to wed

Today, many people, especially men, are struggling to have families and others have failed to get married because it is very costly in terms of bride price.
In many African societies, bride price was meant to be a gift given from the man to the bride’s family as a token of appreciation for raising the girl. Today, it is highly commercialised with some parents considering it a source of income. But marriage is an institution started by God and is supposed to be holy. From the Garden of Eden (Gen 2:18-24), man received a wife from God and at God’s timing meaning that only God is supposed to consummate marriage.
Holy marriage leads to happy family life, but it is no wonder that many families today are in shambles and tears. Here are some of the major causes:-

Exorbitant bride price demands by parents, which means that if the man fails to pay, there will be no parental blessings. This has contributed to many unholy marriages and majority are opting to cohabit and even have children outside marriage.
Excluding God in marriage i.e. marrying or being married off by self without seeking the presence of God. Many people still don’t believe that marriage is made by God. This leads to lack of marriage blessings, misunderstandings and even break ups.
Reluctance of parents to teach their children about marriage and all issues surrounding it. Today, children have got many teachers and trainers, for instance, peers, housemaids and media. Thus children end up being misled and making wrong choices of life.

The church is also suffering because people who are not wedded fear to come up and serve God openly. Some church positions require a person to be wedded. This has hindered the people from becoming full servants in church.
Therefore, upon this background, the church is stepping up its effort to restore the institution of marriage to its original intension and parents should also accept to work with the church to help their children to attain holy marriages by:-
Allowing bride price to be based on ability to pay not as a fixed charge!
The public [parents and couples] is encouraged to attend retreats and seminars organised to teach the goodness of holy marriage and also give support to the young people so that they are encouraged to take it up and churches should give a helping hand through facilitating weddings or charging subsidised church weddings.

Finally, parents and people intending to marry should work with the church being a representative symbol of God, to ensure that they attain holy marriages and eventually blessed families. A godly family is happy and strong leading to a strong church and eventually a strong nation. For couples cohabiting, it is not too late; you too can still return to God to consummate your marriage into a holy and blessed one. Hence a call for all stakeholders especially couples, parents and church to find ways of making marriage easy and revival of Christian marriage is just but inevitable.
Rev Can Simon Sibomana,
[email protected]
Wabigalo C.O.U
Kampala