Thursday March 13 2014

In the mind of a woman: Let your partner know all your plans

Let your partner know all your plans


By Kiiza Akiiki

“In love we share, just as we care.” This is one of my personal mottos that I have always lived by. I believe that if I truly love someone, sharing with him anything is just fine. This is because I trust him. Allan and I have a few projects we are running and we both contribute towards them. But by the time we met, he had already invested in land. I’m sure if he didn’t love or trust me, he wouldn’t have disclosed this, neither would I have revealed anything about my cattle farm.

Opening up helps us share knowledge on what to do in order to make things better. He is such an open person that he shares all about his expenditure and I don’t need to ask him about things. He knows that it is his obligation to tell me about the progress of the projects.

That is the same thing I think all lovers should do. There should be transparency in our relationships, to avoid wrangles. Okay, somewhere –somehow, people fear to fully trust others because of the weird things they end up doing. There are so many weird stories out there.

Could it be the case with this couple? Fred and Susie run a business in the same building. They normally spend the whole day together and actually know all the losses and profits made on what day. But recently, Fred came across some of Susie’s secret developments.

Fred became insecure and asked her to either leave his house or include his name on the documents since there is no proof of where and how she got the money to invest. He believes Susie could have been cheating on him or she stole money from their business. What would you do in such a case? Susie created room for doubt and it will be quite hard for her husband to trust her again.

This wouldn’t have happened had Susie shared the idea with her husband. It was a question of trust. It is possible that Susie did those things innocently. She could have thought of so many things like her husband dying or the current business collapsing and so wanted a plan B. Still, she should have shared it with Fred.
I plan to buy a car and I am saving for it. Believe me this will not surprise Allan because I keep talking about it and often show him that I am capable and ready to get my own car. (Don’t get bored with my examples). I always make sure that he meets my friends and even if they call, his heart is contented and I think he believes that any time soon, I will go back home with new wheels.

I happened to share Fred and Susie’s story with my friend Ritah, and she said the lady could have suspected something about the man, for example that he had a mistress or something. She reasoned that it could have had something to do with the in-laws. There are some greedy in-laws who pressure women after losing their husbands. They chase them out of the house and take the deceased’s property.

What they normally say, according to Ritah, is “Our brother, your husband is dead, meaning we are done with you. Leave our brother’s house if you still want to live.”
Even in such circumstances I am very sure that such cases can be solved, that’s if the man is transparent. Trust in a relationship will do it good.