Eleanor and Matthew Nabwiso’s fairy tale

“I like her character the most. It is real, not something she fakes. She is playful, a character that cheers me up. Sometimes, I get back from work, so stressed and tired, only for her to lighten up my world. She does not keep grudges, she does not live in the past.” To Matthew Nabwiso aka Gilo, Eleanor Nansibo aka Hope is the same woman he fell in love with years back.

Nabwiso says he knew Nansibo was “the one” in the process of being her friend. “I showed her all my bad colours as a way of testing her and she still did not treat me any differently,” he says.

To Nabwiso, it was all about being friends from the onset, even though he had not planned to marry an actress. The two are traditionally married, of which he confesses to having “begged” Nansibo to introduce him to her parents, until she relented. “Her family received me well, and were positive about our whole affair,” he remembers.

Nabwiso believes marriage is what you make it. “When you have it at the back of your mind that you are meant to be with this person forever, then you find a way to work at each other’s weaknesses,” he advises. Refering to the book, Men are from Mars…Women are From Venus, he says, “Any man who has read this book will find marriage and its challenges easier to handle.” He helps around the home, and even confesses to having woken up in the night to soothe the crying baby.

Man in the labour ward
While the hospital policy where his wife gave birth is for every man to be present in the labour ward, Nabwiso is joyful about the whole experience and is even ready to do the same every time his wife delivers. “If a hospital won’t let me in the labour ward, I will not take my wife to it,” he asserts, adding, “It is a good thing to witness their struggle in there. You begin to see your wife differently,” he confesses.

Her only flaw
After much pestering, he opens up and tells me those things that annoy him about Nansibo. “I hate it when she makes me explain everything over and over again,” he says. At this point, Nansibo interjects and speaks of how she keeps forgetting. The two make eye contact, and exchange a smile before finally laughing out.

Nabwiso also talks of Nansibo having a problem with time management. “You call her and she says in 30 minutes she will be ready. When you arrive home, she asks for another 40 minutes! I hate it most when I have a tight schedule,” he says. But he is also quick to confess that as a man, you get to realise that this is a problem common among most women.

Why I love Matthew- Eleanor
The IT graduate is calm and collected. She is welcoming and she quickly offers me a glass of water. “He is cute,” Nansibo says of Nabwiso. When I ask her about Nabwiso’s flaws or things that annoy her about him, she takes her time thinking about it and even after this, says there are none she can point out, which could confirm the fact that indeed, she does not keep grudges.

“He is generous, he is too good to people. Sometimes, one may think he’s faking the nice character but that’s the real him,” Nansibo praises her prince charming instead. “He likes fish, matooke and the groundnut paste the most,” she adds, reflectively, a woman definitely in love.

My marriage tricks
Her definition of marriage is friendship, an agreement where mutual understanding flourishes. “Married people should be friends first, and have respect for each other,” she advises. But couples should not overstep their boundaries by disrespecting each other because they are friends.

For a successful marriage, she thinks it’s about preparation and marrying for the right reasons. On whether marriage is being trivialised these days, Nansibo agrees and attributes it to people marrying for the wrong reasons. “You marry a prince and you end up with a gateman after the wedding,” she tries to illustrate.