He who fears to be hurt, should never love

Love is beautiful, it feels so nice to love and be loved. A soul that is loved and pampered is everyone’s envy. The glow on her face supersedes even the annoying daily schedules. The thought of him brightens her day and her eyes are blinded, she can’t even see the fault that others see in him.

However, to some people, love is just a sweet dream, a bedtime story and nothing more. When you wake up, you feel the thorns, your heart sinks and your appetite dies.
This is what we call real life. Before you choose to step in the ocean, keep your other foot at the shore.

Life is a ‘bed of roses’ beautiful, lovely but once you lay on it, you can never escape the thorns. When you choose to love get ready to be hurt, to share and to spend some nights awake.
At a certain age, we stop searching and just settle with what we have. As you grow, you realise that not all dreams come true, you smile at your childhood fantasies but appreciate and work towards reality. If you fail, you are bound to marry every year and have four children from four wives.

“He who fears the thorns should never crave the rose,” goes the old adage. Relationships and marriage are for strong people. People who don’t threaten to divorce every moment something goes wrong. An Adult who doesn’t run to his/her parents or senga every time they are starved. Or a bold woman who doesn’t call her ex every time kameeza money is not enough.
When you choose to move in with him or her, we believe that you are ready for whatever comes with that decision. Of course, it will not be as soft as you expected but who says you are supposed to rush out of the examination room because the exam is tougher than you expected.

As we sent off a friend for marriage, his aunt shared an old story of a dog on a bridge.
Sometime back, a dog crossed the bridge to search for food. It was rushing that it didn’t pay attention as it passed the bridge. After getting its prey, it started to walk back home but as it stepped on the bridge, it noticed another dog below it with a much bigger prey.

It tried so much to ignore but eventually greed caught up with it, it wanted to get the bigger animal the below the bridge had. How could it keep its meat and still get the other?
It had to make a choice, either to just go with the meat in its mouth or drop it in the water, dive in and get the other meat from the ‘other dog’. It gave in to the latter.
Little did this dog know that ‘the other dog’ in the water was actually its shadow and not reality. In the end, it lost out on both targets.

That’s life, if you are not satisfied with what you have, in an effort to get more, you might end up losing even what you have.
Husbands, treasure the wives you have, she might not look as good as your neighbour’s wife but she belongs to you.

Regardless of the hurt and challenges the two of you go through, nothing is permanent and if you shift your eyes from what is around you and concentrate on what you have you will realise that - a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.

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