To yesterday’s victors and the vanquished
What you need to know:
- It is impossible to demonstrate love sincerely and truthfully in 24 hours
Valentine’s Day is represented by many images. For me, the image that always plays on a loop in my head is of American actor Tm Cruise jumping on talk show host Oprah Winfrey’s couch as he shared his unbridled love for his then betrothed Katie Holmes. His excitement was so infectious that I could feel it all the way in my living room in Uganda. Similarly, when the marriage crumbled, I could feel Holmes’ fear and helplessness.
I guess English playwright, poet and actor William Shakespeare was right on the money when he observed that all is fair in love and war. In other words, in both situations man can be excused if he ignores conventions and abandons common sense when making decisions.
For most of us Valentine’s Day might be the closest we will ever get to a war. It gives us the opportunity to see generals at their weakest and most vulnerable. It also gives opportunity to brave nobodies to rise from the shadows to prominence. It is weird that even if we know in our sane part of the brain that this is a day just like any other, it still has a hold on us. We have the body count to prove this. Many relationships that could have matured into something substantial ended yesterday because someone did not or did something they were not supposed to do. Many an “officer’’ are now examining strategies that did or did not work so that next year they do better.
Right now, most WhatsApp groups are actively discussing who received what gift and who did not. Those who were victorious will walk around with that glow for a few days. They will probably come to office wearing the perfume or the necktie to show off their spoils from the battle.
We will probably hear from the Stingy Men Association of Uganda (SMAU) fraternity, those overgrown adolescents who are missing out on a full life because of their fear of the frontline. They will return from their men’s conference to their bachelor pads and try to keep themselves from facing the reality of their situation by posting witty comments on social media.
In all fairness, when you think about it, Valentine’s Day is nothing more than a show and tell kind of activity for adults. So, the SMAU fraternity, however gullible, might have a point, because it is impossible to demonstrate love sincerely and truthfully in 24 hours with a few token items. Love is one of the greatest forces of nature; how can we even be foolhardy to even think we can try to quantify it or contain it to one day celebration? I believe it is quite impossible to wrap such a force in cellophane because even the biggest bouquet of roses would still fall short.
If your loved one is not the kind to get consumed by frivolous emotions, which means you ended up uncelebrated and unacknowledged, take heart. After all, we know that as Ronan Keating crooned, you say it best when you say nothing at all. And to you the day’s victor, enjoy your good fortune but do not try to hold onto it tightly, for love is as fragile as those fresh roses and will simply wither away if you not let it breathe.
