Modern bride has slayed away the essence of the day

What you need to know:

  • They had that regal air around them; distant and inexplicably beautiful. They knew without a doubt the day belonged to them and therefore, they did not need cheap antics to get attention

The wedding day is one of the happiest and most vital days in a person’s life. You are not only showing the world the person you have chosen among the many, but you are also making a public commitment to spend the rest of your life with that person.  It is a day that should not be taken lightly or frivolously. The brides of past generations knew this and approached the day with grace, poise and dignity. They had that regal air around them; distant and inexplicably beautiful. They knew without a doubt the day belonged to them and therefore, they did not need cheap antics to get attention.

And get the attention they did; people lined up streets and village paths just to catch a glimpse of the bride. For years, the spectacle would be a topic of discussion and young girls would vie to be the bride during their playtime. But not anymore, many brides today are brash, flashy and an embarrassment. Attending a wedding ceremony these days makes one feel as if they are watching an episode of Bridezilla.  It is no wonder many guests, instead of enjoying the moment prefer to record it on their phones probably to view later and laugh or go viral on social media.


One thing I want to stress is everybody looks beautiful on their wedding day. With or without make-up you will look gorgeous, but it is not bad to add something extra on your special day. While brides from the olden days made do with Copper Girl and some lip colour of sorts, the modern bride has a professional make-up artist at her disposal.  The make-up artist is now the most important person of the day and they take their time to make their importance felt. By the time they are done, you have a transformed bride and not usually for the better.  Most of these artists have not learnt the cardinal law of make-up which is less is more and the best make-up should be invisible. They also do not know that what looked good on the Caucasian bride in a YouTube tutorial will not work on African features. The mandatory red lipstick on prominent African lips, drawn angular eyebrows and red ochre face powder often turn the lovely bride into a clown.

The gowns

Most bridal gowns used to be floor length with long sleeves covering up the bride’s not-so-flattering features while accentuating her best features. But not anymore, bridal gowns these days seem to follow a set trend; tight and revealing as much flesh as possible. I often feel sorry watching the bride struggling to breathe or trying not to faint as the gown cuts off blood circulation. They emphasize the bride’s cleavage and back, leaving little to the guests’ imagination. I do not know how this is possible but this style manages to look bad on brides of all shapes and sizes. The very thin bride often looks like a dressed chicken with her bony, skinny arms and back on display. While the plus-sized ones end up looking like high-end call girls. The slits on the gowns have now gotten so high that they make Angelina Jolie’s famous slit seem demure.

The music

When you think things could not get worse, they actually do with the music and the dancing. Gone are the days of the poignant wedding match music. Today, a bride will not think twice about twerking in the presence of her in-laws and relatives.  I can understand if the bride is a queen dancer in some band or a musician for it would be a shame to not exhibit her best moves on such a wonderful day. But most brides cannot and should not dance even if it was to save their lives, but they insist and end up making fools of themselves. As a new member of the family, people will be studying you, trying to put you in one box or other. Dancing wildly and indecently at your wedding is one way to earn a position in the naughty box; everything that goes wrong henceforth will be correlated to that three-minute dance at your wedding. If God forbid the marriage does not work out, guess what the general consensus will be? “We knew she would not make a good wife, not with the way she was dancing at her wedding,” they will say. It does not matter that the blame is squarely on your husband, what matters is whether you made a wrong move or is it moves and you will forever be judged by that.

If you are the next bride please, ask yourself this question: “Must we dance?”